On Becoming A Eunuch

[SplitDik]

Has anyone read this book "On Becoming a Eunuch"?

Here is the description (from http://outskirtspress.com/webpage.ph...=9781432711436)

By Shad Meshach

My Story of Sexual Addiction and How I Overcame it

This is my story on how I overcame sexual addiction through surgical castration. In my account of events I cover my childhood background, and the events that led me into my addiction. I describe the tremendous amount of time and resources I put into counseling and self-help programs to no avail. I discuss my struggle in choosing alternative options, such as guillotines and chastity suits, and describe the excruciating decisions I had to make, including the decision of never having children, and the difficulty I had in finding a doctor who would perform the surgery.

This story is a compelling account of how I overcame sexual addiction through surgical castration and of why I know it is the only solution that can provide a permanent and effective cure for many men out there who are struggling with their own sexual bondage, so that their hope for a normal and healthy life may be restored. It is a must-read for anyone struggling with a sexual addiction or who knows someone who is.

[jemagirl]

No I haven't read it. I wonder if anyone has ever bought it as a gift on Amazon for someone they were worried about

[FianceeUvBigGuy]

That nom de plume seems a bit suspect.

Shad(rach), Meshach, and Abednigo? (See: The Holy Bible. In fact, we all should...Torah available for those of the Hebrew persuasion at no extra cost...Ok, OK, ten percent off, just for you, Bubelah!)

Yoli
Ecumenical Type

[SplitDik]

Originally Posted by FianceeUvBigGuy

That nom de plume seems a bit suspect.

Suspect in what way? A lot of people have biblical names actually, and might take on such a nom de plume if so inclined.

It is likely that there was a religious basis for this guy's motivation, but I haven't read the book so have no idea.

[Hash]

Well, I ordered a used copy from Amazon, cost $13.00 with shipping. I just want to compare his life with mine. What's interesting is the cover, he's sitting with his family I assume, being very happy. I suppose that's appropriate, but not what I expected. There again, I'm not sure what I was expecting. As Yoli would say, time for kaffe!

[micropenis]

Originally Posted by Hash

What's interesting is the cover, he's sitting with his family I assume, being very happy. I suppose that's appropriate, but not what I expected. There again, I'm not sure what I was expecting.

I am trying not to expect anything anymore. Fewer expectations equals fewer disappointments.

[FianceeUvBigGuy]

Originally Posted by SplitDik

Suspect in what way? A lot of people have biblical names actually, and might take on such a nom de plume if so inclined.

It is likely that there was a religious basis for this guy's motivation, but I haven't read the book so have no idea.

My comment was not intended as a slam. The name just struck me as funny.
Maybe he'll write his next piece about the perils of going to the beach without sunscreen, and do so under the N de P "Sonny Burns" (or as a female by the name of "Mella Knoma", or a piece about what it's like to be beneath the bleachers at an athletic event, under the name of "Seymour Butz".
Like you, I've not read the book.

Yoli
Literary Critic for the East Possumville Weekly Outburst (Subscriptions, anyone? I'm on commission here )

[Milkman]

I would be very interested in a review of it, since I am thinking of ordering it.

[Hash]

Well I received my copy and read it, took all of about 20 minutes. It's more a pamphlet than a book. The man is a Messianic Jew, meaning he converted to Christianity. He had a sex addiction that he couldn't deal, pornography ect.. He went to Dr. Spector who castrated him. He's doing well now, happy ending. That's it in a nut shell. It's a book that any of us who are eunuchs could write, but because of embarrassment or the shame of being outed, we haven't. I could write more, but it's a very simplistic book. Anyone want to read it, let me know.

[Elizabeth]

Sexual addiction does not exist. It's a made up disorder to make people feel guilty about being sexual creatures. It's promoted by religious counselors as the reason for every problem in the world.

The truth is that we are sexual creatures. It's a spectrum from those who have very strong drives to those who have very little sexual drive. The notion that anyone over "average" is a sexual addict is like saying that people are "air" addicts if they breath hard.

The problem is not the sex drive. It's the guilt and shame that accompany it due to opprobrium coming from religion. People with high sex drives do not choose it any more than people choose to breath a lot of air.

Go look up the "Diagnostics and Service Manual", the holy grail of Psychiatry. There is no such mental disorder as sexual addiction. It's propaganda.

Elizabeth

[Senjougahara]

Originally Posted by Elizabeth

Sexual addiction does not exist. It's a made up disorder to make people feel guilty about being sexual creatures. It's promoted by religious counselors as the reason for every problem in the world.

Some people have very strong sex drives and they may feel that their libido causes them to compulsively seek out sex. It's not entirely unreasonable to liken this behaviour to an addict's compulsion to (smoke, drink, whatever). Personally I struggle to empathize as my sex drive is almost non-existent and I've never been addicted to anything. I even tried to get myself hooked on nicotine, just as an experiment. Didn't work.

Originally Posted by Wikipedia

Sexologists have not reached any consensus regarding whether sexual addiction exists or, if it does, how to describe the phenomenon. Some experts believe that sexual addiction is literally an addiction, directly analogous to alcohol and drug addictions. Other experts believe that sexual addiction is actually a form of obsessive compulsive disorder and refer to it as sexual compulsivity. Still other experts believe that sex addiction is itself a myth, a by-product of cultural and other influences.

"Nymphomania" and "satyriasis" are not listed as disorders in the DSM-IV, though they remain a part of ICD-10, each listed as a subtype of "hypersexuality."

The American Psychiatric Association publishes and periodically updates the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM), a widely recognized compendium of acknowledged mental disorders and their diagnostic criteria. The most recent version of that manual, DSM-IV-TR, was published in 2000 and does not recognize sexual addiction as a diagnosis. Some experts have expressed that excluding sexual addiction from the DSM represents a problem. The DSM does, however, include a miscellaneous diagnosis called Sexual Disorders Not Otherwise Specified, and includes as one of the examples of it: "distress about a pattern of repeated sexual relationships involving a succession of lovers who are experienced by the individual only as things to be used." Other examples include: compulsive fixation on an unattainable partner, compulsive masturbation, compulsive love relationships, and compulsive sexuality in a relationship. Hypersexuality, by itself, is a criterion symptom of hypomania and mania in bipolar disorder and mania in schizoaffective disorder as they are currently defined in the DSM.

The World Health Organization produces the International Classification of Diseases (ICD), which is used globally and is not limited to mental disorders. The most recent version of that document, ICD-10, includes "Excessive sexual drive" as a diagnosis (code F52.7), subdividing it into satyriasis (for males) and nymphomania (for females).

[kristoff]

Originally Posted by Elizabeth

Sexual addiction does not exist. It's a made up disorder to make people feel guilty about being sexual creatures. It's promoted by religious counselors as the reason for every problem in the world.

The truth is that we are sexual creatures. It's a spectrum from those who have very strong drives to those who have very little sexual drive. The notion that anyone over "average" is a sexual addict is like saying that people are "air" addicts if they breath hard.

The problem is not the sex drive. It's the guilt and shame that accompany it due to opprobrium coming from religion. People with high sex drives do not choose it any more than people choose to breath a lot of air.

Go look up the "Diagnostics and Service Manual", the holy grail of Psychiatry. There is no such mental disorder as sexual addiction. It's propaganda.

Elizabeth

While I doubt that an addiction exists here, there definitely can be issues of sexual compulsivity. Perhaps there is a fine line. Most non-judgmental psychologists and therapists acknowledge that the concept has utility in helping select clients and patients, and therefor do not spurn it, in much the same manner as AA or NA.

The whole conception of sexual addiction was hardly a manifestation of the religious establishment. In fact, it was started by a fella named Patrick Carnes, when he was a PhD student at the University of Minnesota, and couldn't keep his pants zipped up, and got caught. While he was finishing his probation, he finished his dissertation on sexual addiction, and wrote a book on the subject. He started Sexual Addicts Anonymous.

Believe in it or not, it has helped many. That in itself allows for some credibility.

[tugon]

Originally Posted by Elizabeth

Sexual addiction does not exist. It's a made up disorder to make people feel guilty about being sexual creatures. It's promoted by religious counselors as the reason for every problem in the world.


Elizabeth

If the disorder is made up I sure suffered from it. The compulsive drive for sex was ruining my life. I can not explain why with all my bad behaviors I did not destroy my health. I was on a downward spiral searching for riskier sex. I became very good at manipulating others to satisfy my addiction without concern for them other than what they bring to my addiction. A good day off from work was when I had been with 4 or 5 men. These acts were not loving affectionate acts but just the contact needed for me to please yet another man.

The addiction drove me to have sex at various jobs or speak too often about sex. My humor was almost completely sex based. Unless you were oversexed I was not a lot of fun to be around. The addiction became very costly. If I was not able to meet anyone or be with a regular I spent hours on gay phone chat lines. I would buy porn and pay for professional phone chat services because I could tell them my kink. I would pay men for sex or buy what they wanted to add another to the list.

Looking at my behaviors and the lengths I was willing to go to satisfy my wants looks like other addictions to me. Like an alcoholic my need for more kept growing. Sex like alcohol became the most important thing to me. Again not the person I was doing it with but the act. Castration was the help for me. I still have many of those thoughts and they are what I rely on for masturbation. I fear T because I believe my behaviors would revert to those dark days. Like an alcoholic who stays away from alcohol to have control over his life I need to avoid T to have control over my life.

[SplitDik]

Originally Posted by tugon

If the disorder is made up I sure suffered from it. The compulsive drive for sex was ruining my life. I can not explain why with all my bad behaviors I did not destroy my health. I was on a downward spiral searching for riskier sex. I became very good at manipulating others to satisfy my addiction without concern for them other than what they bring to my addiction. A good day off from work was when I had been with 4 or 5 men. These acts were not loving affectionate acts but just the contact needed for me to please yet another man.

The addiction drove me to have sex at various jobs or speak too often about sex. My humor was almost completely sex based. Unless you were oversexed I was not a lot of fun to be around. The addiction became very costly. If I was not able to meet anyone or be with a regular I spent hours on gay phone chat lines. I would buy porn and pay for professional phone chat services because I could tell them my kink. I would pay men for sex or buy what they wanted to add another to the list.

Looking at my behaviors and the lengths I was willing to go to satisfy my wants looks like other addictions to me. Like an alcoholic my need for more kept growing. Sex like alcohol became the most important thing to me. Again not the person I was doing it with but the act. Castration was the help for me. I still have many of those thoughts and they are what I rely on for masturbation. I fear T because I believe my behaviors would revert to those dark days. Like an alcoholic who stays away from alcohol to have control over his life I need to avoid T to have control over my life.

I agree. I had very similar experience. I'm hetero, but was finally barely doing work and instead spending lots of money (up to $5k per week) on prostitutes. I basically had to have about 10 orgasms per day or would be intensely consumed by sexual desire.

It is definitely an addiction in the sense that you know it is hurting your life in many ways (financially, health risk, losing job, losing family, losing friends, ruining marriage) and you still continue with the behavior.

I guess the only point about there being no such thing as sex addiction is that perhaps society could be more accepting of the need for some segment of the population to get frequent sex. So there is that argument.

But for potential for compulsive urges, sex is way up there with other drugs.

[spankey2]

Have got to weigh in here. The people that recognize that there is a thing called sex addiction win!!!! In fact those describing their addiction have done a great job in describing the compulsion and the results of that compulsion. Sex Addiction, howerver, is more like Over Eaters Anonomys as we all have a libido, as we all have an appitite. When we look at pleasure as something that has us, rather than us having it, it becomes a problem. As a therapist I can assure you that Addictions destroy more than they can ever do to please us as human beings. Even Eunuchs can get caught up in the HEAT of the castration, the phantasy, and just the compulsion to throw personal saftey and health out for a moment of pleasure should signal a problem. Some people can turn off a compulsion or compulsive behaviors, but some can not. Once started down the road, you may find that there is no return from that trip. Sexual addiction has many tentacles and disgusies. It is not "made up" or some shrinks imagination. It is very real and the problems that it creates can ruin families, friendships, jobs, health, and more. I welcome questions and comments. spankey2