Castration or Bust

[Beleza]

Hi there,

Well, I'm back.

This time I have decided it's a lifestyle change. I plan on being either chemically castrated the rest of my life or physically castrated.

I was on androcur for 3 months and stopped after my wife said she wanted sex again. Well, I tried it (life with testosterone again). At first I thought I could do it, but I wasn't happy. Not happy at all. I was curious to see if things would go back to the way they were.

Slowly but surely they did. (not in this order)
-The semen after an orgasm came back. It was liquid more than white semen then it slowly returned to normal semen.
-The morning erections returned.
-My testicles, which I thought had shrunk proved they had by getting larger again. One actually was larger than the other for a while.
-My libido returned.
-I'd read the board and would get erections again. (unlike when I was on androcur and I'd read it to read)

It was so gradual. I eased out of it as easy as I'd eased into it (thanks to reading hours and hours of the board posts from those who had tried things before). But I got to the point where I knew that I didn't like it. I am a eunuch or have that type of mentality. I haven't ever felt better than I did when I was testosterone free (or as close to it as possible).

After a nice long talk with my wife we both said ok to doing it again. I'm so happy!! Last night I took my first androcur and this morning I took my second. I'm looking forward to week 3 again when I saw the earliest signs that it was working.

It's so great having this board. The board helped me cope while the testosterone poisoned my body and mind. I look forward to being back among the testosterone free members here again soon.

Love ya!!

[Beleza]

Hi,



Was this post odd? I'm just wondering because no one had anything to say?



I seem to always stop threads or don't get responses. Was it my avatar?

Sorry for the desperate plea for feedback, but I knew no one could read my mind.

I hope I've never offended anyone here by one of my posts or anything?

[jemagirl]

Hi,



Was this post odd? I'm just wondering because no one had anything to say?



I seem to always stop threads or don't get responses. Was it my avatar?

Sorry for the desperate plea for feedback, but I knew no one could read my mind.

I hope I've never offended anyone here by one of my posts or anything?

I have not read many of your posts, but there is nothing offensive in this one. As a rule most folks just read and don't respond to posts. So don't worry too much about that, and if the thread ends with your post....wel you just got the last word in.

There are a lot of post that I don't feel qualified to respond to as they lay outside my interest or area of knowledge. The great thing about the EA is the level of diversity here. If I don't know what to say some one else probably does. If you don't get a response to one of your posts try rewriting and reposting. Some times people just don't see it.

Regards,

Jema

[Beleza]

Hi Jema,

Thank you! I'll follow your suggestions!

[jemagirl]

Hi Jema,

Thank you! I'll follow your suggestions!

Thank You Beleza

[Christina]

Hi there,

Well, I'm back.

This time I have decided it's a lifestyle change. I plan on being either chemically castrated the rest of my life or physically castrated.

I was on androcur for 3 months and stopped after my wife said she wanted sex again. Well, I tried it (life with testosterone again). At first I thought I could do it, but I wasn't happy. Not happy at all. I was curious to see if things would go back to the way they were.

Slowly but surely they did. (not in this order)
-The semen after an orgasm came back. It was liquid more than white semen then it slowly returned to normal semen.
-The morning erections returned.
-My testicles, which I thought had shrunk proved they had by getting larger again. One actually was larger than the other for a while.
-My libido returned.
-I'd read the board and would get erections again. (unlike when I was on androcur and I'd read it to read)

It was so gradual. I eased out of it as easy as I'd eased into it (thanks to reading hours and hours of the board posts from those who had tried things before). But I got to the point where I knew that I didn't like it. I am a eunuch or have that type of mentality. I haven't ever felt better than I did when I was testosterone free (or as close to it as possible).

After a nice long talk with my wife we both said ok to doing it again. I'm so happy!! Last night I took my first androcur and this morning I took my second. I'm looking forward to week 3 again when I saw the earliest signs that it was working.

It's so great having this board. The board helped me cope while the testosterone poisoned my body and mind. I look forward to being back among the testosterone free members here again soon.

Love ya!!

Hello Beleza,

This is wonderful news dear. Sorry I did not post sooner. I'm glad your wife agrees with the decision you have made to continue chemical castration. It is important for both of you to have an understanding about what is going to happen as time goes on. I am happy for you.

I am also glad that you took the advice of so many here and tried the chemical route first. It truley is "the" way to test drive castration before taking any irriversable steps that you could have ended up regreting.

Thank's for keeping us posted, and do let us know how things go in the future and if you will be getting surgery. You have many friends here that will lend advice to you should you need it.

[sag111]

Beleza you look great and yes do take the advice of others here.Iwas out of town and just got back in and seen your post.Iwas on depo provera for two years befor my wife and i decided to go for the surgery and so far we are happy with it so do keep us informed and love your pic

[Yellowjacket]

I found your perspective very interesting. Is an avatar your picture it is pretty good. Being last it is probable a blessing of sorts

[Beleza]

Thanks to everyone else for responding.

It meant a lot!!!



Thank you very, very much.

[Riverwind]

Sorry, I should have jumped in sooner, I took androcur for a year before being castrated and I have no regrets. After I was castrated I told my ex-wife and my kids. The whole family knows, no secrets. The best part of all of this is the friends that I have made here, for the first time in my life I could talk to guys like me. Good luck with your quest, having a loving wife to stand with you is fantastic.

Remember we are here for you.

River

[madscientist1]

When I stopped taking Depo-Provera the following happened to me:


-The semen after an orgasm came back. It was liquid more than white semen then it slowly returned to normal semen.Same here.
-The morning erections returned.Yup.
-My testicles, which I thought had shrunk proved they had by getting larger again. One actually was larger than the other for a while.I don't think mine had a chance. I quickly went back on.
-My libido returned. Same here.
-I'd read the board and would get erections again. (unlike when I was on androcur and I'd read it to read)Don't you hate that?

[Beleza]

Good Morning Mad,

Thanks for explaining the things that happen when you stop taking Depo.

I think people knowing the same physical changes happen on Androcur, after you stop taking it, happen with Depo too is probably important.

How long did you stop?

Yes, I TOTALLY hated coming back and reading the forum and having erections (after I'd stopped taking Androcur). lol... something just happened when I typed that last sentence that's kind of funny. The thought sent signals down "there" to get aroused. There was no answer though.

How long were you off Depo before you started again? What made you decide to stay testosterone free (or as close to it as chemical castration allows you to be)?

See ya!

[madscientist1]

Thanks for explaining the things that happen when you stop taking Depo.

I think people knowing the same physical changes happen on Androcur, after you stop taking it, happen with Depo too is probably important.

How long did you stop?For 2 months

Yes, I TOTALLY hated coming back and reading the forum and having erections (after I'd stopped taking Androcur). lol... something just happened when I typed that last sentence that's kind of funny. The thought sent signals down "there" to get aroused. There was no answer though.

How long were you off Depo before you started again? What made you decide to stay testosterone free (or as close to it as chemical castration allows you to be)?I quit because I was hoping the effects were permanent. They were not, unfortunately

[Beleza]

Hi there,

I thought I'd give an update. It's coming up on my second month. I'm now taking 50mg a day of Androcur.

I don't have erections anymore, unless I work at it.

My skin is super soft. I love that!!

I don't really feel any major angst. Now that could be because I'm doing that with my mind, but I think it's more because of the reduction of testosterone. I do get upset and stuff, don't get me wrong, but I don't feel a competitive thingy within me anymore.

I had sex with my wife last weekend and it was very cool. It was more sensual. Thank gawd she likes foreplay! I ejaculate a drop "maybe" if I try to pleasure myself. The desire to climax is really not there. I didn't have an orgasm, but even when I wasn't taking Androcur I usually don't climax. I've noticed changes in the way I process sensual thoughts and feelings. For instance, I was walking down a sidewalk and the wind going over my skin, around my neck or across my face was very erotic. I had to take my temperature and say to myself, "Are you losing it?"

I did start off taking 100-150mgs and slowly went down to 50mg.

The mind is so funny. I feel my testicles and I know they are smaller, but I keep thinking (like the first time I took Androcur) "Well, maybe they aren't" But they are.

My weight distribution in my hips has changed VERY mildly, but my wife and I noticed a definite difference. I have lost about 5lbs more, which I kind of did on purpose. I'd done so much reading on the forum, that I'd seen weight gain be a part of the lessening of testosterone in the body. So I actively began watching my diet. I'm down to 199.

I think that's about it, other than I'm starting to ponder the idea of surgery or not. If I'm going to need to take testosterone the rest of my life, then why would I get rid of my natural testosterone makers? The dosage I'm taking is relatively low and so I think with regular check ups at the doctor I may keep them. Not sure though.

Thanks for this forum. It's truly wonderful.

[Beleza]

Sorry, I should have jumped in sooner, I took androcur for a year before being castrated and I have no regrets. After I was castrated I told my ex-wife and my kids. The whole family knows, no secrets. The best part of all of this is the friends that I have made here, for the first time in my life I could talk to guys like me. Good luck with your quest, having a loving wife to stand with you is fantastic.

Remember we are here for you.

River

Thank you!!

I thought I had said thank you, but after reviewing the thread I see I didn't. Sorry about that.