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Thread: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

  1. #1
    I really do look like my avatar Dave's Avatar
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    And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    >>I've heard about these weddings before. I've never been at one where they descended into fights.
    >>I have seen passed out ladies and staggering drunken men at weddings. I once saw a husband dropped from the chair at a Jewish wedding. The Groomsmen were drunk.
    >>A backyard wedding where the stench of chicken coop that were slaughtered for the dinner (raise your own) was all too unappealing wafted into the wedding party.
    >>It's the happiest day of your life and Mom's mug shot is the ultimate remembrance.
    >>

    Wedding bash ends in cuffs
    Jessica Heslam By Jessica Heslam
    Thursday, May 3, 2012

    http://www.bostonherald.com/news/col...ome&position=0

    A modern-day Romeo and Juliet are on their honey-moon trying to make good on their vows after barely surviving their North Shore wedding from hell, which ended in a bruising brawl and two busts — including the groom’s mother.

    “They’re in love. They’re doing everything in their power to make it work,” busted mom Darlene DeIorio, 45, told the Herald last night though tears. “I’m going to be there for them no matter what. My heart is so broken. I’m sad for them.”

    The Saturday night nuptials between Anthony DeIorio-Weiner and Nancy Guido at the Danversport Yacht Club ballroom — which featured more than 250 guests — erupted into mayhem after the groom’s two younger brothers were denied booze at the bar, according to a police report.

    This service slight somehow incensed DeIorio-Weiner, 25, who punched a wall and began tearing apart the coatroom after someone from the bride’s side of the family told him to calm down.

    When the bride’s brother approached DeIorio-Weiner, the groom punched him and the pair were soon tussling on the floor, police say.

    Danvers cops showed up and found a surreal scene: Wedding guests yelling, screaming and rolling around on the ground in a pig pile. At one point, police said, the groom’s mother, Darlene, attacked the bride’s mom.

    The two were separated and Darlene was escorted outside — only to return to the scene of the marital mayhem. This time, police said, she threw a chair across the room and began punching another woman.

    Darlene’s version of the story is a bit different. It was all about disrespect, she said. According to her, the whole kerfuffle began when the bride’s mother began yelling at Darlene’s 70-year-old mother and waving her finger in her face.

    Darlene insists she was only defending her mom and her family’s good name. How could that be assault? As the fighting escalated, Darlene claims she went to leave but was insulted by her ex-boyfriend’s galpal, who told her she was no lady.

    Police again intervened, and after Darlene put up some stiff resistance, she was led away in cuffs.

    On the way to the station, police said, Darlene turned her wrath on them and said some pretty hurtful things about one of the officer’s mothers.

    “I could have done things differently or better,” said a repentant Darlene, who pleaded not guilty to disorderly conduct and resisting arrest in court Monday. “There should have been many arrested. The incident was unfair. It’s an embarrassment to the bride and groom.”

    Meanwhile, her son Anthony and new daughter-in-law Nancy are off in the Dominican Republic, enjoying their honeymoon.

    Or so Darlene hopes.

    “I apologize,” she said last night. “I pray to God that everything works out for the best and I pray that love prevails. I really do. It was supposed to be two families becoming one.”

    The DeIorios and the Guidos.
    “They also call it the Winged Isle. Some say it is because the island, if seen from above, would look like butterfly wings. And I do not know the truth of it.” Then, “ ‘And what is truth?’ said jesting Pilate.” From: The Truth Is A Cave In The Black Mountains by Neil Gaiman.

  2. #2
    The Rest of the Story Riverwind's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    LOL, It brings images of cake in the face, the punch bowl being thrown, champagne bottles going in all directions, Insults from both families "for the Honor"

    Lock the whole bunch up for a week.


    River
    He who would trade liberty for some temporary security, deserves neither liberty nor security.

    Your representative owes you, not his industry only, but his judgment; and he betrays instead of serving you if he sacrifices it to your opinion.
    Edmund Burke

  3. #3
    I really do look like my avatar Dave's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    I want an invitation to the baby christening or maybe Thanksgiving dinner.

    think: film at 11
    “They also call it the Winged Isle. Some say it is because the island, if seen from above, would look like butterfly wings. And I do not know the truth of it.” Then, “ ‘And what is truth?’ said jesting Pilate.” From: The Truth Is A Cave In The Black Mountains by Neil Gaiman.

  4. #4
    New Story Editor Cainanite's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    Looks like future family events are going to have to be alcohol free.

    That, or Fox TV is going to have a new reality show to rival The Jersey Shore.
    "Stories are living and dynamic. Stories exist to be exchanged. They are the currency of Human Growth."
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    New eunuch stories can be submitted to eafictionarchive (at) gmail (dot) com

  5. #5

    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    Yes Cainanite, methinks booze may have played a role in this mayhem...250 guests...wow...huge wedding! Mom may have a drinking problem...At least when she drinks, everyone else has a problem Hehe Jackie

  6. #6
    I really do look like my avatar Dave's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    I've heard of weddings where the BEST MAN insults the Groom's mother and since the Groom and Best Man were brothers, they fought and knocked over a few chairs and everyone let them fight. When they were tired out, the guests reset the table sand every one sat down to the wedding meal like nothing happened...

    The other time I heard about a wedding fight was when cultures clashed.
    The groom's side of a wedding had bought with expensive gifts from a extravagant registry. This was their rather non-ethnic custom of buying wedding gifts. The Bride's side of the wedding brought cash and did the "Wedding Dance" where a hat is placed on a table and everyone has to dump cash in the hat and dance with the bride. Now the Groom's people were caught out twice. They brought the gifts ont he registry and now were being "fleeced" at the Bridal Dance for the cash in their pockets.
    There were words and slapping and tears and more bad words.

    And a good time was had by all.

    I came back to add that at this dance, the Father of the Bride stands with a tray of filled shot glasses and the Mother of the Bride stands with her apron open to catch the money that every guest has to publically throw into her apron in full view of the other guests. Now if you bought a gift off the registry, that gift sat back in a house miles away and wasn't present. So you could spend mucho $$$ and be thought a cheapskate.
    “They also call it the Winged Isle. Some say it is because the island, if seen from above, would look like butterfly wings. And I do not know the truth of it.” Then, “ ‘And what is truth?’ said jesting Pilate.” From: The Truth Is A Cave In The Black Mountains by Neil Gaiman.

  7. #7
    The Rest of the Story Riverwind's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    Funny you should bring this up, this money dance is big with my wife's side of the family, all Mexican and Native American. Love those money dances, complete with Mariachi band.


    River
    He who would trade liberty for some temporary security, deserves neither liberty nor security.

    Your representative owes you, not his industry only, but his judgment; and he betrays instead of serving you if he sacrifices it to your opinion.
    Edmund Burke

  8. #8
    I really do look like my avatar Dave's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    Around here mostly Polish and Slavic weddings use the Money Dance.

    It's a tiny maze of ethnic customs when you have to buy a wedding gift.
    Is it cash or is it housewares?

    When I was in college, a Fraternity brother got married and we were told that if we stuck around past the ceremony and enough guests didn't show up, we could eat. They paid for 120 meals and 120 people ate. Seven college guys sat down to a table of food that we couldn't dent. I mean literally, over half the food on the table was left and the caterer gave it to charity. That was what that particular wedding party expected as a wedding.

    I was at another wedding put on by church members and those women kept sending a driver to KFC to by fried chicken to keep the platters filled. They hid the fact until afterward and no guest said anything about it. The couple had no money and without their church's efforts would have been married with just the witnesses.
    “They also call it the Winged Isle. Some say it is because the island, if seen from above, would look like butterfly wings. And I do not know the truth of it.” Then, “ ‘And what is truth?’ said jesting Pilate.” From: The Truth Is A Cave In The Black Mountains by Neil Gaiman.

  9. #9
    The Rest of the Story Riverwind's Avatar
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    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    My wife's family all Native American and Mexican so when they have a wedding, its off the the church, the priest does his thing the happy couple return to the place of the party, the Mariachi band gets into it, the Tequila starts for flow, the dancing and singing follow, then the money dance, usually daddy of the bride has a crisp $100 dollar bill to pin to his daughter and the mother not to be out done does the same for the young man, then as long as they dance someone is pinning money on them until the bride and groom have fleeced both families as they are by this time drunk the Mariachi band is sing coocooroo, (spelling) and checks are being pined on the kids. Its a wild party, Menudo is brewing for the after party.

    The song is about two doves and one singer goes away from the party to return the answer as the person in the group asks the question

    Some of the best hangovers I have ever had have been after a good Mexican wedding.

    River
    He who would trade liberty for some temporary security, deserves neither liberty nor security.

    Your representative owes you, not his industry only, but his judgment; and he betrays instead of serving you if he sacrifices it to your opinion.
    Edmund Burke

  10. #10

    Re: And A Good Time Was Had By All (wedding edition)

    We just went to a Mexican wedding in a restaurant in an area just outside of the town limits(convenient location, that). The couple had been together 25 years and have 3 children. Afterwards, the groom thanked the priest for marrying them - finally.

    There was a two hour interlude where I was bored to tears and did not undersand what was happening and why we were waiting. It turned out it was the interlude between the newlyweds strick Catholic churchmember friends and the newlyweds party-hardy friends. The alcohol started flowing and when we left, Lupe, who is about 4'6" tall and has a body that goes direct from legs to beer barrel torso, was pole dancing with a support pillar for the room in her tight minidress and high heels.

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