Tim was back to work today. We didn't attempt intercourse last night. I figure that even before the banding he'd need more time to "reload" after an orgasm yesterday morning. We did talk last night about what he sees at the end of the road we've started down. He expects that at some point his penis will be useless for sex, and he's okay with that. He knows I won't cut it off, and he knows that it's just not in me to mock him for not being able to get an erection or have orgasms. I said I knew someone who would, and both of us said "Megan" simultaneously. We also talked about how his penis might be destroyed in a humiliating way that would have a benign explanation if a trip to an emergency room proved necessary, and the best we could come up with was pouring scalding grease or boiling syrup over the head. That might make the head scar tissue and destroy the nerves, and it could be explained away at the emergency room as a cooking accident. I simply cannot do that to him, though, but I have little doubt that Megan could and would if asked. We have no immediate plans to pursue anything like that any time soon, but talking about it was getting him excited. He was thinking Megan's friend Alicia might participate at least to the extent of watching and laughing at his agony, but I really doubt it, and I don't think it would be a good idea to involve her even if she'd be willing. I told him to keep the mental imagery of that in mind when he's trying to get an erection. He just smiled.

I'll have Mia after school again this afternoon, so I need to get some chores done now. I might add more later if time permits.

Sandi

Wow...interesting. I just started hormone therapy today...200 Mgs of Spironolactone and 2 Mgs of estrogen split into two doses daily...Should start seeing/feeling the affects in several weeks/a month..Maxing out in 3-4 months...at which time I should be , chemically, a eunuch...when the procedure you mentioned might become viable... Do you think Megan has it in her to do this? If she does, I assume you will band it tightly...If she removes or totally destroys the head...I guess a little trip to the E.R. would be in order...Then you can take Stumpy home,,,Yummmm hehe smooches Jackie

Originally Posted by butterflyjack

Wow...interesting. I just started hormone therapy today...200 Mgs of Spironolactone and 2 Mgs of estrogen split into two doses daily...Should start seeing/feeling the affects in several weeks/a month..Maxing out in 3-4 months...at which time I should be , chemically, a eunuch...when the procedure you mentioned might become viable... Do you think Megan has it in her to do this? If she does, I assume you will band it tightly...If she removes or totally destroys the head...I guess a little trip to the E.R. would be in order...Then you can take Stumpy home,,,Yummmm hehe smooches Jackie

If I read Megan right--and I've known her for over 20 years--the only qualms she'd have would be about the legal repercussions, so her concern will be a plausible "innocent" explanation for the burn. We'll have to see, though, whether Tim and I will ultimately decide to go through with it, and that depends a lot on whether his penis recovers or we declare it "officially" functionally useless.

Do keep us posted on your "chemistry experiment", Jackie. If Tim ends up unable to achieve an orgasm, he may eventually want his libido reduced. I'd prefer that he stay libidinous as ever, of course, but it might be more than he can take.

Sandi

I picked Mia up after school as usual yesterday afternoon, and she worked on her homework while waiting for Misty to come for her. I really would like to have asked her what she and Ashley did when they had their sleepover at her house, since the two of them had experimented with each other's genitals before at our house, but she didn't volunteer anything, and I didn't want to come across as a nosy mother. Okay, well, I am nosy, but I didn't want to come across that way. So I didn't ask.

When Misty came to get Mia, I took her (Misty, that is) aside and told her that Tim is still unable to get a firm enough erection for sex and that the only way we've been able to have intercourse or give him an orgasm is with a rubber band around the base of his penis. Even that hasn't worked reliably, because usually he cant get enough of a weak "starter" erection for the rubber band to hold and enlarge. Also, I'm afraid that each time he uses the rubber band, we're doing further damage to his penis, making the next time all that much more difficult, ultimately making even the rubber band technique totally useless.

I told Misty I was thinking of giving him a few more days to recover, and if he hasn't been able to get an erection without the rubber band by Friday, I want to try some extreme stimulation, both physically and visually, to see whether his penis has been damaged to the point where we'll never be able to have sex again without the rubber band. This Friday is an "off" Friday at work for both Tim and Misty, but Mia will be in school, so the three of us could do something together. I reminded her that Tim has a fetish for genital pain and the threat of destruction of his genitals, but he knows where I draw the line, so to instill real terror, I wanted her participation. Tim doesn't know how far Misty would go. I told her it would involve inflicting pain, being naked in front of him, playing with his genitals, and bondage. It wouldn't be dramatically different from what we did when Megan was here, but I'd want Misty to take a much more active role. She didn't have to do anything she wasn't comfortable with, but I had in mind kicking, beating or squeezing his testicles and looking as if she were enjoying his suffering.

Misty said she was sympathetic to the idea but Mike needed to buy in, as she wasn't going to do anything behind his back. I told her I wouldn't have it any other way. She said she'd let me know this evening. Then she said, "It sounds fun."

By the way, Tim couldn't achieve an erection big enough to use the rubber band on last night, so we just cuddled, and I fell asleep with my head on his shoulder and my arm around him. Also, he had no "woodie" this morning.

Sandi

Misty told me tonight that Mike said okay to her being involved Friday. She said he wasn't thrilled about the idea, but he recognizes the purpose as worthwhile.

Not much else to report. Mia was busy with homework all the time she was here this afternoon, and we really didn't talk that much. I set a plate of cookies on the table as she was working, and some disappeared. It's not like her to be that quiet.

Sandi

You think she's bothered by something? She seems like such a good kid...Good going with the 3 way...I look forward to the lurid specifics...hehe
smooches Jackie (eunuch to be)

Originally Posted by butterflyjack

You think she's bothered by something? She seems like such a good kid.....

Yes, she was. Keep reading....

Mia sat quietly doing her homework again this afternoon, and I knew something had to be bothering her. I stood behind her chair and started rubbing her shoulders. "What's wrong, Sweetie?" I said. "It's not like you to be this quiet."

"Nothing," she said, but her voice quivered a bit.

"That bad, huh?" I said, sitting down in the chair beside her at the table. "Can you tell your mom about it?"

"Ashley said we're Lebanons now and we're going to burn in hell," she sobbed.

"Come with me," I said. I took her by the hand and led her to our overstuffed rocker-recliner, sat down, and patted my lap, indicating that she should sit there. "Now what's this all about?" I asked.

She told me that when she and Ashley were in bed together last weekend, they'd played with each other's clitorises for a while, then Ashley kissed Mia and stuck her finger in her vagina. "It felt weird, but not bad weird," Mia continued. "But then she tried to stick her tongue into my mouth. That was just disgusting. I told her to stop."

"Uh-huh," I said. "And then what?"

"Ashley started crying," Mia said. "I told her I didn't mean to hurt her feelings but I just didn't like what she was doing. That's when she said we were Lebanons now, and her mom said Lebanons burn in hell."

"Sweetie," I said, "I think the word you mean is lesbian, and I don't really believe you are one, and, no, you're not going to burn in hell, and neither is Ashley."

Mia wiped a tear from her cheek and pulled my arm around her tight.

"You're just starting to feel what it's like to be a sexual person. You're becoming a woman. It's natural to want to explore the new sensations your body is giving you, and it's natural to be curious. A while back you were excited about the idea of playing with Emily's older brother's penis, weren't you?"

Mia nodded but didn't say anything.

"So you're interested in boys sexually, too?"

Again she nodded without saying anything.

"When you grow up, do you hope to get married to a guy?" I asked.

She nodded.

"People are way too eager to attach labels to themselves and others. Then they begin to think the label is all they need to know about the person behind the label. Lesbian and gay and straight and bisexual are just labels," I said. "Don't put a label on yourself. At your age, you've got at least another seven years to figure out who you are, what you stand for, how you feel about things, and where you're going in life. This is no time to pigeonhole yourself with any kind of a label, okay?"

Mia nodded again, this time cracking a little smile.

"Now about hell," I said. "Would you have love and respect for a man who punishes his children by holding their hands on a hot stove burner?"

"No," she said.

"What sort of father would burn his children to punish them," I said.

Mia looked puzzled but didn't say anything.

"I think, if there is a God, he's a loving father. I don't believe he'd burn his children," I said. "I don't know much about Cristy's religion, but I think she's wrong if she's been telling Ashley that lesbians go to hell. And I think Ashley's wrong in labeling herself--or you--a lesbian. You're both way too young for a label like that to have any meaning."

Mia was smiling a little at that point. I continued to hold her on my lap and began rocking. I ran my fingers through her hair gently and kissed the top of her head. We sat there rocking together for what seemed like an hour, until it was almost time for Misty to come and get her.

"I've got a job for you," I said. Mia looked up at me inquisitively. "Go put five paper plates and plastic forks on the table. You'll find them on the kitchen counter.

Mia did as instructed while I drug an extra chair from Tim's office. We were just finishing when Tim, Misty and Mike came in the door. Mia ran to Misty and gave her a hug.

"What's that all about?" Misty said, looking a little surprised.

"Just go with it," I said with a wink and smile. I went to the kitchen. While Mia was distracted, I got a Bundt cake with 12 candles on top out from where I'd hid it in a cupboard. Mia's face lit up when she saw it. I set the cake on the table and lit the candles. "I know a 12-year-old who needs to blow out some candles," I said.

Sandi

Ha Ha
I am not that old after all.
I actually guessed that one! poor kids!! fancy having to go through all this stuff at age 12 I was 15 in 1960, still building billy carts, riding my bike all over the Country, and doubt if I gave sex or girls much thought at all. Am I wrong? or was puberty happening a lot later in those days? All my friends were much more interested in cricket and football than those damn girls Ha Ha!
Cheers

Very nice Sandi...Lucky little girl...smooches Jackie

Originally Posted by msts1945

....
fancy having to go through all this stuff at age 12 I was 15 in 1960, still building billy carts, riding my bike all over the Country, and doubt if I gave sex or girls much thought at all. Am I wrong? or was puberty happening a lot later in those days?
....

Girls go through it before boys, and there's a lot of variation within either sex. Mia seems to be ahead of many of the girls in her class. Then, too, Ashley is older than Mia and is giving her ideas she probably wouldn't come up with on her own.

Sandi

I played with Tim's penis last night but couldn't get him to even a partial erection. I was just testing; I wasn't really wanting to initiate sex, but Tim took it that way and started petting. I told him to roll over and gave him a nice long back rub. At least I can give him pleasure that way.

Sometime during the night he must have had a wet dream, though, because there was a spot of semen on the sheets. Does anyone know--can a guy have a wet dream without an erection? I'm wondering whether he had one we missed.

Sandi

Mia was back to her old self again this afternoon--bubbly, wanting to do anything but homework, and a real chatterbox. Ashley's name never came up, and the closest reference to sex was when she talked about a boy who couldn't get the fly on his pants to close after he used the restroom and was rescued by a teacher who had some safety pins. She thought that was pretty funny.

Misty called at lunchtime to see whether we were still on track for tomorrow's playtime with Tim. I told her yes and that he still didn't seem to be able to get an erection as of this morning but had a wet dream overnight. I said I was taking that as a sign of hope, but I wasn't expecting a miracle from our playtime tomorrow. She said she'd be here as soon as she could after dropping Mia off at school.

Sandi

Wow...How lucky is Tim...?? Two wonderful women...Jackie

I come all the time without a firm erection...Sometimes without one at all...But I have ED and am an older man...I assure you, it's possible..
Jackie

Originally Posted by butterflyjack

I come all the time without a firm erection...Sometimes without one at all...But I have ED and am an older man...I assure you, it's possible..
Jackie

Thanks, Jackie. That gives me hope that maybe I can still give him an orgasm even if intercourse is not possible. I'm not crazy about giving oral sex, but if that's the only way, I guess I can learn to like it for his sake, but I'll try masturbating him first.

Sandi

Misty came over at about 9:00 am. I told Tim we were going to give him a little incentive to get an erection if he would go downstairs and get undressed. Misty and I stayed behind in the kitchen as he went down. I explained to Misty what I had in mind.

We would play the potato game. For readers who have been following the blog for a long time, this game will be familiar, but for newcomers, I'll explain. Also, we played it a little differently this time: This time there was a twist to the penalty for losing. Misty and I would tie a plastic bucket to Tim's testicles, then step back several feet and take turns throwing potatoes into the bucket. On a given round, if both of us got our potatoes into the bucket, we'd step back one step for the next toss. If neither of us hit the target, we'd take a step forward. But if only one missed, that one would take off an item of clothing, and the next toss would be from the same position. The new twist this time was that the loser--the one to be naked first--would be tied up by the winner to the other set of hooks. As an incentive to really try to get the potatoes into the bucket, the winner would give the loser 20 swats with a table-tennis paddle, during which the bucket would continue to hang from Tim's testicles.

After the loser was penalized, the winner would then untie the bucket but leave the rope tied around Tim's scrotum so that his testicles made a better target. She would then spank him with the paddle, beat his testicles with the broom-handle club, dance around naked in front of him, masturbate him, kick his testicles, and do whatever else seemed likely to give him an erection, given his fetish for genital torment.

Despite the fact that we were dressed differently, we were each wearing eight items of clothing, but she had a better aim, and Tim seemed to really want her to win, because he swung the bucket wildly for me but not for her. As the bucket filled, he found it harder to swing, though, and that advantage for her was lost.

As it turned out, there seemed to be a magic distance. Any closer and we'd both often hit the bucket, and any farther and we'd both often missed, and we seemed to rarely be at that magic distance where only one of us missed. We were always half a step too close or half a step too far away. The result was that there were a lot of potatoes in the bucket before I finally lost, at which point Misty was still wearing her bra and panties. After tying me up, she took those off and gave me the 20 swats. She's got a good arm.

I began to get a better appreciation for what Tim experiences when I tie him up. Having someone inflicting pain while you're tied up and can't stop her from doing whatever she feels like to you is both terrifying and intensely arousing sexually. Being tied up and spanked brought back vivid memories of when my father used to punish my brother and me by tying one of us stretched across the table, ankles tied to the bottoms of the table legs on one side and wrists tied to the tops of the legs on the other side, and whipping our buttocks with his belt while the other was made to stand naked watching as an object lesson. I wondered what memories the experience was bringing back to Tim's mind. Probably when his sister and her girlfriends tied him to her bed naked.

At this point, Tim's penis was still hanging straight down, but the weight of the bucket full of potatoes would have kept his penis that way even if he'd been able to get an erection. We'd used essentially the whole ten-pound bag and had to pick up the ones that missed the bucket to finish.

Misty then turned her attention to him.

Now, Tim knows what I'll do to him, but Misty was a wild card in the game, and neither of us knew for sure how much she'd get into her role. This, too, was a new and unnerving experience for me. I was tied up watching another woman doing whatever she felt like to my husband's genitals, and I was powerless to stop her or even suggest that she back off, and she seemed to be thoroughly enjoying what she was doing. I didn't really think she'd cut anything off or crush his testicles with pliers, but I'd told her do do what she felt comfortable with doing, and I really didn't know for sure what she'd feel comfortable doing. I was not in control; I watched with the no more knowledge than Tim had about what would happen next. She seemed to feel comfortable doing a lot, but I was glad it was Misty in control and not Megan.

When Misty untied the bucket, Tim had a very weak erection. His penis was hanging limp, but the color was more rosy than when he's not aroused, and the diameter was a little larger. She gave him about 50 swats with the paddle, which didn't seem to have much effect. Tim didn't even struggle to get loose. I know she was swinging the paddle just as hard as she did in spanking me, and my posterior is still tender from it. She then beat his testicles with the broom-handle club, starting with light taps and then progressively getting more aggressive until he was struggling wildly and his wrists were getting red from chafing on the ropes. He was shaking his head. His breathing was irregular shallow gasps, and there was a look of panic on his face. I didn't know the girl had it in her to go that far. She looked back at me periodically to see whether I was approving, and I nodded to reassure her that it was okay to continue, even though I'd probably have backed off if I were doing the beating. I knew Tim would be disappointed afterward if he didn't receive more than he could handle.

Through all this, Tim's erection barely increased. Finally, she untied the rope from his testicles and began squeezing them hard enough that Tim was getting tears in his eyes, then she began masturbating him with one hand while stroking her own clitoris with the other. She kept that up for--I'm guessing--ten to fifteen minutes or so. Finally, she announced that he was a hopeless case, untied me, and invited me to see what I could do.

I knelt in front of him and worked on the head of his penis with my tongue for several minutes. His penis inflated a little, but nowhere near firm enough for intercourse. I thought it might be enough of a "starter" erection to use the rubber band on, but the band did little more than maintain the amount of erection he had. I gave him oral sex with the rubber band on for another fifteen minutes or so, but nothing seemed to be happening.

At that point, I got dressed. I let him stand there, still tied up with the rubber band still in place, while I went upstairs to get coffee, sandwiches and Mia's left-over birthday cake ready for lunch while Misty squeezed his testicles and played with his penis, still naked. We finally untied him, he and Misty got dressed, Tim took the rubber band off, and we all came upstairs for lunch.

I asked Misty how she liked playing dominatrix. She laughed and said that was about as wild an experience as she'd ever had and that beating a man's testicles was a whole lot more fun than she'd expected. Tim thanked her, which seemed to strike her as funny. "Dad, you're just weird," she said, laughing. I expressed surprise at how much she seemed to relish what she was doing to Tim, and she said, "I was just imagining that Dad was my father." I guess that says something about that relationship. I told her I'd been thinking about my father also.

Misty stayed for a few minutes after lunch but then said she had errands to run before she had to pick Mia up from school. After she left, I told Tim I was really turned on by the experience and needed a good orgasm and asked whether he was up to it. He said sure, but it would have to be with Willie. After he took care of me, I offered to give him oral sex, but he said it probably wouldn't do any good. We just lay in bed naked, cuddling for several minutes, then got dressed. An interesting start to the day.

Sandi

Sounds to me that Tim might be ready for a vacuum pump. After having gone though six months of testicle banding and then going through radiation treatment for prostate cancer, I am no longer able to achieve an erection. I don't know if the banding play we went through caused it or the radiation treatment did. Maybe it was a combination of the two. Either way, after trying all of the ED pills with no success, my doctor prescribed a vacuum pump. Cost almost $600 and I am thankful for good medical insurance. Actually you can buy the same brand pump on the internet for about $150. Amazing how much they jack up prices when there's medical insurance involved. Anyway, it works adequately enough to get the job done and has another benefit which the medical supply company doesn't advertise. Applying the pump while he's tied up opens up a few more torture possibilities if you have a good imagination. If you want more information let me know or ask your questions and I will be happy to provide some of my experience.

By the way, haven't posted in a while but have followed your adventures with a lot of interest. Keep up the good work!

P.S. Please don't physically damage Tim's penis. There are other ways to achieve the same results without doing visible damage. And it's a lot more fun. I can give you hints on that too......

Originally Posted by RickslcFlorida

Sounds to me that Tim might be ready for a vacuum pump. .... Applying the pump while he's tied up opens up a few more torture possibilities if you have a good imagination. If you want more information let me know or ask your questions and I will be happy to provide some of my experience.
....
P.S. Please don't physically damage Tim's penis. There are other ways to achieve the same results without doing visible damage. And it's a lot more fun. I can give you hints on that too......

Please do post your ideas! Would a vacuum cleaner hose do the job of the pump as an experiment to see whether we want to invest in a "real" pump? How is the pump used? Do you band your penis after using the pump to maintain the erection? Also, your ideas about "the same results without damage" also sound good. Please tell more!

Sandi

Sandi....

I'll try to answer all of your questions as briefly as I can but believe me, its possible to write a book about the subject. I would not recommend the vacuum hose as an alternative although I've never use one for that purpose. First it is probably too small in diameter. Two of the things that happen when you pump is that the penis increases in diameter and in length. Once the penis has expanded to the full diameter of the vacuum hose it obviously can't grow any thicker, however, it also won't grow much more in length from that point either. The other thing is that you can't control the suction on a vacuum cleaner. Its either on or off and whatever pumping was achieved would happen fast compared to a manual pump. The reason this is important is that the part of the penis in the pumping chamber nearest the opening of the chamber is the part that will pump up the quickest. If you pump too fast you get the same results as with too small a diameter. The base of the penis would expand quicker than the head. THe result is that you stop gaining length. With a manual pump you can pump in stages, release the vacuum a little bit and pump the penis up in steps that permit the the penis to grow both in diameter and in length. You pump up very quickly but the results will not be very satisfactory. Slow and steady gives you the best results.

The whole kit usually contains a number of different sizes of bands that you slip off of the vacuum tube and onto the base of the penis once you achieve the best results you can. The manufacturer recommends leaving the band on no more than 30 minutes. You can actually leave it on longer without permanent damage as people who use other types of bands have proven. Obviously you need to use common sense and not go overboard. Chose the smallest diameter band first and work up to a larger band if necessary. All of the bands will open up enough to fit around the penis. The smaller sized one will put the greater pressure on the penis and maintain the erection the longest.

What happens if you pump up too much....simple....it hurts. Obviously, I have not pumped up past the point that I can stand the pain because I am controlling it. But if you appled a pump while Tim is restrained, you would control the action. I'll let your imagination figure out the rest. The interesting thing about the pain is that it is maintained at whatever level you reach as long as you don't release the vacuum pressure. In otherwords, if you leave it on for five minutes, you get the same level of pain for the full five minutes and it doesn't change a bit. It's dificult to describe the feeling when you pump up to a high level but Tim could tell you if he likes it. I can't imagine him not liking it.

This is probably enough information about pumping to get you interested. The next subject is banding of the testicles. If you read BME you might assume that a lot of guys use elastrators for this purpose. When I got interested it was for a different reason than most banders. I didn't want to castrate myself or even simulate it. I acutally wanted to achieve a firmer erection. Remember, if everything is working properly mechanically, the thing that controls the strength of an erection the most is it's owner's brain. Put a tight band around the testicles in the right circumstances can actually cause an erection. Many people don't know this but when a man is hanged he often dies with an erection. This is completely involvuntary. It just happens. And thats what happened when I first started banding. What I used was one of my wife's hair bands. I think they are call scrunchies. I put around my scrotum between my penis and testicles. I then pulled it out as far as it would stretch twisted around on itself and pulled the band back around my scrotum. In otherwords, I doubled it up on itself. Not as tight as an elastrator band and definitely not as painful. In fact it was quite comfortable and tight enough that if I left it on for twenty minutes, my testicles started getting cold and the scrotum turned purple in color. And the best part was the erections I got. Fast forwad six months and this is what happened. I got carried away. I would use the band evry day, even when having sex wasn't an option. At some point I began to realize that my testicles were getting smaller. Even my wife commented on it. I was also getting less interested in sex. If you knew me you would know that was a big change. And my erections were becoming weaker. Just the opposite of what I had started out to get. About that time I was diagnosed with prostate cancer and went through five months of daily rfadiation treatments. Which event actually caused my impotence or if both contributed is an open qauestion. But my guess would be that my ability to have an erection was definity influenced by my banding. If you want to reduce Tim's libido but still want to achieved an erection on demand than a combination of banding and use of a vacuum pump would be the solution for you. I apologize for writing so much but it wasn't something I could explain in a twitter message (tweet). Good luck to you and Tim,,,,,,,

Rick

Thanks for the information, Rick. Tim would never buy something with the word "penis" in the name or other indications that it relates to sex organs or sexual activity. He's deathly afraid of getting on some mailing list or getting his name associated with such things. However, he's very creative, and he's made a lot of "toys" for our playtime with things from Home Depot. I have no doubt that, if he's motivated, he'll figure out a way to make something roughly equivalent to the pump you described. I'll pass on your suggestions.

I will not band Tim's testicles again. When I did it before, it left him with permanent injury--spermatoceles, which are hard lumps in his scrotum that grow slowly over time. Also, the last thing I want is to reduce his libido. If I knew a way to increase it, I would. Even when I'm not in the mood for sex, it does my ego good to be able to get him aroused. I do tie a rope around his scrotum above his testicles to hang weights from his testicles or to make his testicles a better target for beating and kicking, but I always try to be sure I'm not getting the rope tight enough to restrict blood flow or crush vessels.

No such luck last night, though, or this morning, either. We cuddled and petted, but he didn't get an erection.

Sandi