A little more background on our situation may be useful.

When we got married, I knew Tim liked to be tied up naked and have me abuse his genitals. I learned that on our second date. But he hadn't said anything about my cutting anything off. Then when we'd been married a couple of years, Lorena Bobbitt was in the news for cutting her husband's penis off, and Tim went nuts over the case. He would read magazines he'd never looked at before because there was an article about the case. He became obsessed with the case, following every detail in the newspaper. When he heard that she used a red-handled kitchen knife, he went shopping to get me a red-handled kitchen knife. And our playtime began to center on my pretending to cut off his penis or threatening to. As the story faded from the news media, his insistence on having that be part of the games waned a bit, but it has been a constant feature of our playtime.

Now, in the past couple of months, the news has again featured stories of a wife cutting off her husband's penis. A woman in California, Catherine Kieu Becker, is accused of drugging her husband's tofu soup so that he'd pass out, then tying him to the bed with his arms and legs outstretched and then waiting for him to wake up before cutting his penis off while he watched helplessly. As the new accounts tell it, she then ran his penis down the garbage disposal before calling for medical help.

As you might imagine, Tim is again looking for every tidbit of news about the case, and his interest in having me cut off his penis has moved again to front burner, so to speak. We joke about it. "What's for dinner?" "Tofu soup!" That sort of thing.

To humor him, I've tied his hands behind his back, tied dental floss around his penis just behind the head and tied the other end to an overhead pipe in the basement, and had him standing there like that for hours. I figured that would test how real his interest in going through with it might be. He never begged me to release him, but his wrists were a bit raw from struggling against the rope, and there was some blood where the dental floss cut into his penis.

So I want to give him a taste of what it would be like not to have his penis, and I'm hoping someone here who has an interest in having a penectomy has done something for a "trial run." Last night, Tim mentioned that there are male chastity devices, but I'm not that familiar with them. (I did a search in the Internet and found some pictures, and that's about all I know.) Would putting one of these on his penis really give him the sense of what it would be like not to have a penis? I'm doubtful, because he'd know I could take the device off, but at least he'd have the experience of having me stimulate him sexually without his being able to get relief. I also wonder about hygiene with such a device on. Can he keep clean without my taking it off?

So I'd welcome any information anyone here can provide on either numbing or male chastity devices or anything else anybody can think of that would give him a taste of what living without his penis would be like.

I'm also wondering whether I can make it too painful for him to masturbate somehow, like scrubbing the head of his penis with a stiff brush or putting hot sauce on it or something. Anything to deny him orgasm for anywhere from a week to a month.

Sandi

Hi,
electro stim does work . I use a "performa" with 2 metal bands on the dick. keep turning up the current and keep it on for a couple of hours.The numbness lasts for a few hours without any side effect I can see as I have used it for years.
S

Thanks! I found the Performa TENS unit online. The company Web site says it is adjustable from 2 Hz to 150 Hz and 0 to 80 mA with pulse width from 30 to 260 mS. You noted that you turned up the current, but did you turn it ALL the way up? What pulse width and frequency settings did you use? And did it hurt? If so, how bad. (That is, do I need to stuff a gag in Tim's mouth to avoid a 911 call from the neighbors?) Do you think the numbness would last longer if you kept it on longer--or just as long if you left it on less time?

I'm eager for any information you can supply. Tim's homemade device might work the same way if I left it on him longer. When he started struggling against the ropes and carrying on, I turned it off, not sure what I was really doing to him. I don't think it was on for more than 10-15 seconds. (Come to think of it, just getting it out and hooking it up would probably be pretty exciting for him, even if I don't turn it on, given how he reacted last time.) :-)

Sandi

Numbing the penis is really easy. You can just get Lidocaine 5% on Amazon. It works really well. You'd have to reapply it every three hours. But it will be totally numb.

Thanks for the suggestion SplitDik. I may end up using that. It would let me get him all excited and have fun with his frustration when he can't do anything about it. And it sounds like it would be cheaper than a TENS unit, though the effect wouldn't last as long.

But there's more involved.

What I was really hoping for was something that would give him a taste of life with a penectomy -- something that would leave him unsure when, IF EVER, he would get feeling back in his penis again. His fantasy is that I will at some point cut his penis off. (He's been waiting 20 years for that, so I don't think he really expects it to happen, but he keeps mentioning that I'm free to do it and loves it when I pretend I'm about to do it.) A penectomy is not something that reverses itself in a few hours, so I want him to know when we play our games that he's risking something long-term, something that he doesn't know will go away, something that lets him feel a bit of what it would be like if I did cut his penis off. At the same time, I want some assurance for myself that I'm not really causing permanent damage. I love the guy and have no intention of actually cutting him or leaving him with no chance for an orgasm for the rest of his life. But given how nuts he is about this fantasy of his, I want to help him satisfy it in some way, and this is the best way I've thought of to do that. If anybody has an idea how to do something that would achieve the effect -- simulate life without his penis -- without numbing, I'm not stuck on any one idea.

Home Depot sells a light switch that looks like a standard wall switch but has no wiring. Instead it sends a radio signal (like a garage-door opener remote) to a module that you plug into an outlet. You then plug the lamp into the module and can then turn the lamp on and off from the switch. Well, the best idea I've come up with for the near term is to dig out the shocking device he made. It's been stored away in the basement since we first tried it. I'm thinking I'll have him tied to the bed naked, then bring it out as a surprise, hook it up to him, and tell him I'm plugging it in to a light timer that's plugged into the module for the remote-controlled light switch. I'll tell him I'm taking the switch to the other end of the house, and I'm going to roll dice to decide whether to turn it on. I'll tell him the light timer is set to turn on after some random delay -- maybe a minute, maybe an hour, maybe some time in between -- and leave the device on for some random amount of time up to two hours. I'll be going shopping after I roll the dice (and maybe turn on the timer remotely), so he won't know whether I turned the switch on for up to an hour, and he'll know I won't be there to watch him struggling and maybe feel sympathy and shut it off. He also knows how painful it was last time, which is why it's been stored in the basement ever since. I'm thinking the experience -- even if I don't turn it on -- will come close to the excitement thinking I might really be serious about finally doing the cutting. And if the device actually comes on, it will give him some of the experience of not having a penis, assuming that it works like the TENS unit stevelc1 described. What's more, this is something we can do over and over, at least until he's had the device come on for a couple of hours once.

But I'm still not totally satisfied with what I've come up with so far, so any ideas or suggestions would be welcome.

Sandi

Hi. Well, the lidocaine will be the closest to having an actual penectomy. The other stuff you're talking about is just cock electro-torture. Having a penectomy isn't going to be like having random jolts of electricity. Rather it will be like haviing nothing to feel there. Going pee, getting it rubbed, etc. with lidocaine it is simply like there is nothing there. It is like when your cheek and lips are numb after getting a filling.

Also, anything that plugs into the wall for electro play simply isn't safe. I almost died once when a dominatrix attached a commercial electric fence (for dogs) to my balls and then applied a Hitachi Magic Wand vibrator that also plugs into the wall. The combination was giving me jolts just as if I'd grabbed a live wire (I know the feeling because I'm an Electrical Engineer). If you haven't done the grounding right, or if he struggles and shorts something, he'll either get a heart attack or burn the place down. If you want remote electro play you should buy something professionally designed for that, or a dog training collar.

Hmmm. A dog training collar sounds amusing, especially if there's a remote control ;-)

The device he built doesn't get the electricity for the shocks from the outlet. The house electricity just runs a motor and gears. When the shaft at the end of the gears rotates, it opens and closes a switch that connects a battery to an iron thing that has four wires coming out of it. The green wires go to the battery, and the black wires go to his penis. So electrically, the whole thing is isolated from the power. It's pretty crude -- built on a scrap of plywood.

stevelc1 (above) suggested that a TENS unit could numb the penis, and I was hoping for something causing the effect for more than a few hours. Tim's contraption is no TENS unit, but from the sound of things, it might have a similar effect if left on long enough. Even without numbing, Tim loves the excitement of having me inflict pain to his genitals, and, based on his reaction when we used it before, I'd say the device delivers that in spades.

But a dog collar sounds more amusing for me if I can control it remotely. I'm picturing him wearing it while we go out in public and I push the button every time he looks at a pretty girl and watch him try to act like nothing is happening. Definitely has possibilities. :-)

I probably will try the lidocaine first, even if the effects are short-term. It's just that he'll know the effects will wear off soon if he knows it's just something I applied. Maybe I could apply it while he's asleep, if I can do it without waking him up.

Sandi

I've had the TENS unit and other electo torture applied for long periods of times, multiple times, and it never had an actual numbing effect. Maybe a tingle.

Good that the shocker he designed is isolated from the wall. What kind of battery are you talking about? If it is a big battery (car or boat) then be careful as a short could still cause a fire, and the current can still cause heart attack. Any shocks applied to the body need to be very low current and also very low total charge.

The battery is a 6-volt lantern battery, which looks to be roughly equivalent to four D-cell flashlight batteries. I don't think you could start a fire with it if you tried, but maybe. I spilled the beans about what I had in mind to Tim out of concern about what you said. He says the iron thing I described earlier is a "filament transformer". You probably know what that is if you're an engineer. Anyway, he says he doesn't think it stores enough energy while the switch is closed to cause real injury and that the real kick is when the switch opens. Not sure I understand that, but he says he's confident that it's safe and that, as he phrased, "it'll hurt like hell." He's agreed I can do what I have in mind, but if, as you say, there's no numbing from using it, I think I'll put that idea on the back burner for now, as it won't achieve what I'm really after.

C&TL2745, You should definitely look into male chastity. There is a lot of info out there and not all of it is accurate or helpful. Some of the best resources are:

Altairboy's Website: http://www.tpe.com/~altarboy/newstuff.php
ONe of the oldest chastity-related sites on the internet including reviews of devices, fictional stories and personal experiences

Sarah Jameson's Site (and Blog): http://www.malechastityblog.com/ulti...hastity-guide/
She's a great resource to help bring the practice of male chastity to the Normal people out there

I need to run but I will try to post more later tonight. Good luck!

moorster, thanks for the links! I'm imagining Tim's frustration when he goes for weeks with me sleeping naked next to him and he can't even masturbate because I hold the key! (He-he-he.) :-) (is there an icon for wicked laugh?)

Looking forward to your further post.

Sandi

I think your husband and I have a lot in common. I have only recently discovered this fetish of castration and penectomies, but for years I have been interested in male chastity. The thought of a woman controlling the most beloved part of my body and denying me access to it in any way is the ultimate in erotic power exchange. Just the thought is very pleasurable to me.

Having the testicles removed forcibly by a woman is a hot fantasy as it involves a woman completely dominating my sexuality and potentially altering it for the rest of my life. However, there are some problems. That game can only be played once and, from what I understand, I won't look back on it with erotic feelings since those will slowly fall away. It seems to be somewhat of a catch-22 with that one.

Having the penis cut off, however, makes more sense (although it lacks that efficient cleanness of cutting off the testicles). A penectomy is basically permanent and inescapable chastity. The testes, left intact, will continue to product testosterone, perpetuating a strong sex drive. However, this sex drive will be utterly frustrated by the fact that it will never be fulfilled with an orgasm. The desire to organs will remain constant over time but relief will never come. The erotic nature comes into play every time the man remembers that there was a beautiful, powerful and cruel woman who did it to him. She, therefore, has sentenced him to a lifetime of sexual submission to her. The obvious downside is that all of the sexual intensity of this game is concentrated in that one scene where the woman cuts off his penis. There may be many fond memories afterwards, but that's all they will be since there isn't much more to do with a penis-less man.

Chastity is nice because the game can be played over and over for as long or as short as you want. Granted, there isn't going to be a single moment that compares in intensity to the penectomy experience. However, there can be many moments that get close to it. A unique component of chastity play is the element of yearning to be let out of chastity and the perpetual hope that you might be released. With a penectomy there is no hope for release and therefore, nothing that the woman can hold over a man's head. With chastity, every day, day in and day out, the man wonders if this is the day she will release him. The anticipation builds and builds, becoming as unbearable as his desire to orgasm. The woman can tell the man that if he acts out of turn or fails her in any way that she will only extend that time. He submits deeper and deeper to her as she messes with his mind.

In all three of these fantasies, the act or the device is not erotic in isolation. What makes the scene erotic and addictive is the woman behind it. For me anyway, being made to submit to certain things in certain ways by a *woman* is the pinnacle of turn-ons. I think it goes back to being teased by girls in grade school and playing tie-up games with other youngsters. Something was implanted in my mind back then, some sort of gender rivalry and somehow it became associated with eroticism. Later in life, being broken up with by ex-girlfriends really intensified the eroticism of female domination.

Other fantasies that go well with chastity play are abandonment and strap-on play. Being tied up by a woman and left somewhere in isolation while that woman goes out, dates, parties and pretty much forgets all about me is a hugely erotic fantasy. For me it actually stems from something that happened to me in real life but that's a story for another time. Also, being tied down and taken by a woman wearing a strap-on dildo is a very power expression of her dominance over me. I'm not into being a sissy or wearing womens' clothes. You're going to find a lot of that when you research chastity but ignore it if you two aren't into it.

Anyway, I hope this gave you something to think about. I'd love to chat more about it if you have questions.

You're a natural keyholder! You have exactly the right attitude. You know your husband and I don't, but for me that would be an incredible turn-on and incredibly frustrating. You can make guys do amazing things when they want to cum so badly but have no way to do so without you unlocking them first.

The hardest part about male chastity is finding a good device that is relatively comfortable, secure, affordable and works with your body. The most popular devices are the CB-3000 and the CB-6000 (much better). They are plastic and consist of a cage and a ring that locks behind the balls. They are popular because they aren't too expensive (unless you've bought every single variety, as I have), they aren't too intimidating to women, and, being clear, you can see if the skin underneath is getting irritated. While nice and convenient, they are known for not being completely secure.

They say you get what you pay for with chastity devices and I believe it's probably true. The stainless steel devices are supposed to be the best but they are often more expensive. Some are just cages (like this one: http://www.diyorgasms.co.uk/spiral-c...device-review/ ). Others also have a belt and possibly chains that go under the buttocks as well. Most devices have an option to incorporate a piercing at the tip of the penis to make them inescapable. This is often a big deterrent to vanilla couples who don't want any body modification, but since we're on a penectomy blog here I imagine your husband may not object.

Anyone can spend a day in chastity. Working up to about 4 days is also pretty easy. However, going a week or two can sometimes present a challenge. It depends on your man and his body. Some guys have no problem being locked up for the first time ever and not being unlocked for a month. Other guys (like me) get rashes and swelling (edema) after about 4 days of continuous wear. Keeping clean can also be a challenge. With my girl, what has worked well is for her to tie me up to the bed every third night and unlock my device. Then, in the morning give my groin a sponge bath before locking it up again and untying me. We've gone months this way.

So getting chastity to work for long periods will probably take some time and effort to figure out, but if he gets bitten by the chastity bug, don't worry he'll do all the leg work.

Thanks, moorster.

I talked to Tim last night about some of the things I've been thinking about, and he's okay with chastity devices and numbing with topical anesthetics, but he got curious about where I was getting my ideas. I told him I was getting them from the Web and that it started out with trying to get more insight about his fascination with genital torture and mutilation. He grinned and told me to sit down and he began to tell me things about his childhood that I'd never heard before.

It seems that when he was in sixth grade, he was having erections and thinking a lot about naked women but had never had an orgasm. His sister is several years older than he is, and at the time was a senior in high school with a woman's figure. He began sneaking over to her room at night, lying on the floor outside her door with a small mirror, which he slipped partway under the door. By looking in the mirror, he could watch her undress.

He didn't find out until later that she was fully aware of what he was doing--he wasn't as quiet as he thought, and she could see the mirror--and she thought it was funny that her kid brother was getting an interest in sex. She put on a show for him, sometimes a tease, sometimes more explicit, including masturbation for his amusement.

After this had been going on for a couple of months, she invited four girlfriends over for a slumber party. Unbeknownst to Tim, she had explained his habits to the other girls, and they set a trap for him. After undressing and cavorting about in the nude together for several minutes, they suddenly jerked the door open. He figured he was in real trouble, and his sister played to that, telling him he could go to jail for what he was doing, but if he'd take the punishment they were going to give him without telling anybody about it, they wouldn't tell on him, either.

Then they brought him into the bedroom, pulled off his pajamas, tied him to his sister's bed, and played with his genitals. Then his sister wrapped a rubber band around the base of his penis, climbed on top of him and started having sex with him. After a few minutes, she got off and invited the other girls to try him out. He had his very first orgasm ejaculating inside one of the other girls. The rubber band maintained his erection until all the girls had used him. They then took turns kneeing his testicles before releasing him, telling him that if he ever told what happened that night or spied on his sister again, they'd cut his penis off.

He told me he was frightened, ashamed, excited, confused, and thrilled all at the same time. I can only imagine the emotions he was feeling. He said he'd never told anybody about it until now.

I thought the abuse I endured was bad. It was nothing compared to what he went through that night. Now I'm not sure how I'll deal with what I'm feeling after hearing all that. I understand him better for sure, but I'm not sure how knowing what I know now is going to affect the relationship I have with him. My first reaction is to cuddle him and protect that little boy inside him, but I don't think that's what he wants from me. It's going to change the dynamics of our marriage, but at this point I'm not sure just how.

Sandi

Tim and I got to talking more about how his fascination with penectomies and castration developed. He said not to blame everything on the one incident. He downplayed it as one thing among many: There were a lot of things he remembered that contributed. For one thing, his mother ran the family and belittled his father. Until junior high, all his teachers were women, too, so women rather than men were the authority figures. Then he said he remembered history class where one of the more popular girls gave an oral report on the Assyrians and related with some relish the fact that the Assyrians would cut the penises off prisoners of war. He had a friend who was into bondage and liked to be tied up and talked about the Inquisition and tortures used, including castration and penectomy. He remembered that he and a friend were comparing penis sizes when they were caught by the friend's older sister. He said there were so many things that reinforced his interest that he couldn't remember them all. I think now I'm getting a little better understanding, but Tim said not to try too hard to understand. He's just happy that I accept the end result. And I do.

Sandi

I don't know if you realize it but you are an amazing wife to Tim. I really wish there were more women out there willing to take this kind of time and effort to deeply understand their husbands. I think most men have unfulfilled fetishes/fantasies of one form or another. The sad thing is that in most cases, the fetish could be satisfied by an understanding wife with minimal effort on her part. The response is too often something like, "That's weird. You're weird. Just be normal and never talk of this again." If a man likes to be tied up, how hard is it to tie him up and leave him for a few hours while going about one's day? If a man like to be locked in chastity, how hard is it to accept the key and hide it for a few weeks. It takes almost no effort at all. And if the wife find she likes it, it can expand to much more elaborate and interesting mutual play. Anyway, I know I'm preaching to the choir here.

Tim's experiences are very interesting. The experience with his older sister is somewhat alarming and I can totally see how that would lead to some complex feelings about sexuality. Have you ever met her before? How does she seem these days? I wonder if they've maintained a good relationship since then. I would agree with Tim that no one experience should be taken too seriously. As people we're just more complex than that.

I have wondered where my own fascination with female domination (femdom), chastity, bondage and those kinds of activities came from. I'm not totally sure, but like Tim I can think of a dozen things I did or was involved with that may have planted the seed. My own sisters came along after I was already in high school so I basically grew up without sisters. I think that contributed to a sense of mystery surrounding women which later turned into a downright rivalry when I had to interact with competitive girls. Not being a very aggressive youth, I often found myself on the losing side of games, athletics and arguments when girls were involved. As a result, I think as a young boy I was somewhat terrified of girls. Somehow as I got older, perhaps after a few un-reciprocated crushes, that morphed into an erotic fascination with female power. I remember thinking thoughts like, "Girls are the enemy, so why do they cause these feelings in my body when I'm around them?" So, like Tim said, while it's hard to pin to any one moment in time, it is very real and defines a major part of my sexual identity.

I'm curious about one thing. Does Tim have any fantasies about what he would like to happen in the years after a penectomy? I know you'll probably never go through with it (or maybe you will, who knows) but what would turn him on after his penis was gone? Would the thought of you taking a lover to satisfy your desire for penetration turn him on (cuckolding)? If so, what if you started to fall in love with him? If not, what about strap-on play? Now that he had no penis, would the sexual roles reverse by you taking him with a strap-on dildo? Without a penis, prostate massage is about the only way to release building seminal fluids from the prostate and give a man some temporary relief. This is common practice for wives who keep their husbands locked in chastity for more than a couple weeks at a time. Or perhaps he would enjoy the fantasy of you locking him a away in the basement, perhaps a dog kennel, for weeks at a time while you go about your life. My thought is, whatever would turn him on after a penectomy might be a good activity to try now.

I think you should start a blog and post some of your experiences. You've got a great attitude and style and you can write well. There are probably thousands of wives and husbands out there with the same burning questions that you (and I) have.

Originally Posted by moorster

....
The experience with his older sister is somewhat alarming and I can totally see how that would lead to some complex feelings about sexuality. Have you ever met her before? How does she seem these days? I wonder if they've maintained a good relationship since then.

I met Tim's sister at our wedding but haven't seen her in 20 years. She's made no attempt to contact us, and we've made no attempt to contact her. She and Tim seemed to live separate lives due to the age difference--they had separate circles of friends, different interests, etc. I get the sense that there was some hostility between them, but Tim doesn't talk about it, and I haven't pushed him to.
....

Originally Posted by moorster

I have wondered where my own fascination with female domination (femdom), chastity, bondage and those kinds of activities came from. I'm not totally sure, but like Tim I can think of a dozen things I did or was involved with that may have planted the seed. My own sisters came along after I was already in high school so I basically grew up without sisters. I think that contributed to a sense of mystery surrounding women which later turned into a downright rivalry when I had to interact with competitive girls. Not being a very aggressive youth, I often found myself on the losing side of games, athletics and arguments when girls were involved. As a result, I think as a young boy I was somewhat terrified of girls. Somehow as I got older, perhaps after a few un-reciprocated crushes, that morphed into an erotic fascination with female power. I remember thinking thoughts like, "Girls are the enemy, so why do they cause these feelings in my body when I'm around them?" So, like Tim said, while it's hard to pin to any one moment in time, it is very real and defines a major part of my sexual identity.
....

It's painful to admit, but teenage girls tend to be cruel and self-centered. I was, too, and I'm ashamed of what I did to guys. Most girls grow out of it as they mature. I think you'll find that most women are a different species from the girls you recall from your youth. Don't give up on a relationship with a woman. Finding one who would humor your kinks, though, will be tough; I have to admit that. By rights, I should have been totally screwed up--and maybe I am, come to think of it--but having a great relationship with my brother along with counseling in junior high and high school and a few special teachers in high school probably rescued me from what I could have become.

Originally Posted by moorster

I'm curious about one thing. Does Tim have any fantasies about what he would like to happen in the years after a penectomy? I know you'll probably never go through with it (or maybe you will, who knows) but what would turn him on after his penis was gone? Would the thought of you taking a lover to satisfy your desire for penetration turn him on (cuckolding)? If so, what if you started to fall in love with him? If not, what about strap-on play? Now that he had no penis, would the sexual roles reverse by you taking him with a strap-on dildo? Without a penis, prostate massage is about the only way to release building seminal fluids from the prostate and give a man some temporary relief. This is common practice for wives who keep their husbands locked in chastity for more than a couple weeks at a time. Or perhaps he would enjoy the fantasy of you locking him a away in the basement, perhaps a dog kennel, for weeks at a time while you go about your life. My thought is, whatever would turn him on after a penectomy might be a good activity to try now.

Tim's fantasies seem to end with the penectomy. I'm not sure he envisions what he'd want after that. If it happened, I'm sure he'd find a way to deal with it. It must have occurred to him that, in giving me notarized permission to do what I want, he was taking a chance that I'd take him up on it. But I think his fantasy centers on the one act of losing his penis, not on life without a penis. As for me, i simply cannot see myself with another man, at least while Tim is living. He's a tough act to follow. He's a take-charge sort of guy, which is in total contrast to our playtime, and maybe that's another draw for him: During playtime, he gives himself permission to let go of responsibilities, get the world off his shoulders, and focus totally in the moment. I find the idea of using a dildo (in either direction) a bit repulsive. Well, no. A LOT repulsive. Tim is good at satisfying me with his tongue and fingers, but it simply isn't the same as having him inside me. It's more like masturbation. I don't think locking him away would be a turn-on for either of us. Being tied up for the sake of being tied up is not the thrill. Rather, it's being helpless to stop me from doing whatever I feel like to his genitals. A dog kennel in the basement? I can't see that. I broached the subject of numbing his penis with topical anesthetics and keeping him in a male chastity device, and he said he'd be okay with that, but there was no enthusiasm in his voice. It was more or less acceptance, that he'd go along with it if it pleased me. Again, it gets back to his fantasy being about the one act of losing his penis, not about life without one.

Originally Posted by moorster

I think you should start a blog and post some of your experiences. You've got a great attitude and style and you can write well. There are probably thousands of wives and husbands out there with the same burning questions that you (and I) have.

I guess this blog has more or less turned into that. :-)

Thanks for your thoughts and suggestions.

Sandi

That's interesting. I thought for sure I might trigger a hidden fantasy there. It sounds like you're right, that his fantasies are mostly centered around having his penis cut off by a dominant woman. I guess he is a little different than me after all. My fantasies are more about being dominated by a woman and less about the exact manor of domination. The main aspects that turn me on are that she is confident, truly in control, a bit dangerous, and willing to toss me aside temporarily or ignore me for a period. The chastity, the castration or penectomy, the strap-on, the bondage... all of them are just variations on that main theme. However, it sounds like with Tim the main theme is more specific. It's really about the penectomy. Very interesting.

It's too bad that he wasn't more enthusiastic about the chastity play. That has endless possibilities that could keep you both busy for a long time. Maybe he just likes the play you are doing now and doesn't really want to change it.

Well, it sounds like you've got a few ideas of how to simulate a penectomy using numbing cream, chastity and electric play. If you google CBT (cock and ball torture) you may find more ideas. There are numberless types of clamps, crushers, squeezers, vices, prickly wheels, stretchers, needles, burning creams, brands, etc. that are used on the penis and testicles. Another way to numb the penis would be with ice. In fact, when the skin is chilled with ice packs, light scrapes feel like you are actually cutting flesh. All you feel is vibrations, the numbness makes it hard to tell if you are really getting cut or not. Presumably that's the trick the girl used in the movie "Hard Candy." It's something to try. First show him the knife, then make sure he is blind folded before icing him down and then scraping his penis with a blunt knife to simulate the cutting sensation.

If I think of any more good ideas I'll post them here. Of course, if you ever do decide to go through with a penectomy then you simply must report your experiences back here!

I did have another thought. If the penectomy fantasy is driving him crazy and he's not happy, an alternative would be castration. That would remove the unrelenting urge for sex and consequently for a penenctomy. However, it would *not* remove the ability to have sex. In fact, from what I've heard, a little viagra will allow a castrated man to have sex for hours. I recently ran into some posts by a woman who had her husband castrated after his sex drive became uncontrollable. She says her husband became the model husband after that and no longer drove her crazy demanding sex. However, she was still able to get all the sex she could ever want from him on command.

Here are some of her posts. When you visit those sites, scroll down until you see the ones from Cynthia. She actually has a lot more posts on that site and each one gives a little bit more background about her story.

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question...8085149AAAf7wt

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question...paid=add_watch

http://uk.answers.yahoo.com/question...5101803AAKqqlF

Originally Posted by moorster

I did have another thought. If the penectomy fantasy is driving him crazy and he's not happy, an alternative would be castration. That would remove the unrelenting urge for sex and consequently for a penenctomy.
....

I don't really want Tim to want less sex, and his fantasy of a penectomy has been going on for 20 years now. I was looking for a way to spice things up a bit, but he seems content to continue with what we've been doing. However, the ice idea sounds interesting, and driving him crazy is fun for me. He does like it when I pound on his testicles or squeeze them hard, so it's not just about penectomy, but castration is definitely not what either of us wants. I don't want a man who has no interest in me as a woman. Even if a castrated man can have sex with Viagra, the question is whether he'd care to. I want him always to want to, whether I accommodate that or not.

Sandi