With help of internet translators and some corrections, here is the translation of the french text above. All my apologies for all the mistakes that remain. Any corrections welcome.


Let me first specify what led me to integrate EA. I think that my profile corresponds to many people here, and it is undoubtedly reassuring. My relation to sexuality has always been trouble complicated. It appeared to me as a not controlled thing which fell on me too early taking into consideration my maturity. Early, I adopted an attitude of rejection in regard of my sexual urges. This sex which came hard when I did not want, who directed my thoughts,… I masturbated more than of reason during my puberty, seeking calm that followed the orgasm. Even if this calm didn't last.
On a regular basis, I masturbated 5 to 6 times a day.
I already played with needles in my foreskin, subject to uncontrollable pulses.
The momentary difficulties of my life were as many stages leading to sexual self-punishments. Finally, I made unconsciously my sex responsible for what arrived to me. Thus, I mutilated myself the genitals during these various problematic stages. (including a self-circumcision, genital piercings, subincision, attempt a rerouting of the urethra, testicular torture…) I discovered BME and I published many photographs there during that time. I realized that I was not isolated, and that this "malaise" in me was shared by others.*
Having had 4 children with my tender wife, I underwent a vasectomy at age 30. I thought it might fix my problem. In fact that did not change anything in my libido, to the great despair of my partner and mine.
I continued my search of identity, telling me that I was perhaps not as straight as I thought. I tested the gay relationship, but in I did not fit that identity, beyond the sexual character. I also tested the female hormones, considering the fascination that female chest and sensitivity exerted on me. Until recently, I thought i could be myself well with a chest, a sexual form to be between the man and the woman. The transsexuals have always fascinated me.
I then followed with interest some cases on BME which lead to castration. For me castration was reserved for ancient harems, for fetishism or for transgenders.
At that time, I discovered EA.
I read many forums without being active for some time and then on reflection, I realized that perhaps it was the solution that suited my problems.*I thus began a cure of androcur. Admittedly That alleviated my pulsionsproof, but that left me with deep depression.*
I finally discovered that alcohol injections lead to castration. My goal is to reduce my libido to be able to take back control of it. I thus confined myself with 80 proof alcohol (40°), but found that my desires and impulses were always there, and that I could not always assume them. So an additional frustration. I think that the damage caused to the testicles being irreversible, it is necessary to finish the process, and to possibly take a hormonal replacement therapy to thwart the effects of the osteoporosis.*It took me more than 25 years to realize that it was this libido which was the problem, and that if I did not control it, I would always be unsatisfied.
I must specify that my wife having undergone a hysterectomy, her libido, which was not quite large fell to zero, and thus if mine decreased, it is always far beyond her's.*
Consequently, I went on alcohol injections again with the aim to succeed in eradicating the source of my worries. I currently proceed with 188proof alcohol (94°), by small amounts of 1/2cc in each testicle. To date I didn't have any unpleasant side-effect. My testicles and my sex were never big or large, and that would go rather unnoticed if they straightforwardly disappeared.
Pirlouit