Sure, I miss my sexuality. Any 25 year-old would. I still have my masculinity because my balls still swing in their soft sack between my legs. I believe they hang lower now and are larger than ever before because each testicle is literally exploding with testosterone and sperm. Genetically, my balls seek a receptive woman to impregnate, but I have always chosen to share my warm seed only with my male lovers. There was this one time, as a young teen at band camp, that I actually had sex with a girl. I became so physically ill that I couldn’t cum, so I have pretty much decided that my path lies only with other men.

That doesn’t matter now. Man or woman, my drive to impregnate my lover is as strong as ever. I lack only the tool to insert my seed into my lover’s body, or to call it forth myself. Any orgasm I might have is only with my lover’s assistance and is achieved through a massage of my prostate. It is messy and humiliating to achieve an orgasm in this way, but the sight of my pent up seed spraying randomly in all directions from my cockless crotch is extremely erotic to me, and to him. It has become a control tool for my husband because those orgasms are so rare that they have become very precious to me. Of course I now totally control him also in the same way, so it all evens out.

I wonder if any other male from 15 to 30 could possibly refrain from cumming at least once every day? How would you feel with all of the desire and none of the ability? Could you go a month without cumming at all? Could you stand to see your lover walking around nude and become incredibly aroused at the sight, only to be denied release?

Of course, he suffers from the same desires and is frustrated by the same simple fact. We are both cockless. We sacrificed our male organs to each other as a very personal wedding gift when we were married. He knew what was going to happen at the ceremony, but I didn’t discover the cost of our marriage until it was too late. I know that I could have refused and fled, but I understand that I would have lost him.

David is my lover and my soulmate. He has always known my darkest fantasies, and he put a plan into action that granted my deepest desire. Of course, it deprived both of us from ever experiencing an orgasm independent of the other’s total involvement, consent and participation.

I’ve known David since we were 12 years old in middle school. We were both popular in school, and I actually thought that David was straight at first. In our puppy love years he experimented with several girls before turning to me exclusively in high school.

Of course, I had many girlfriends too, since the girls regarded me as ‘safe’. They knew, by my sophomore year, that I would never want to wave my prick in their face like their lewd boyfriends. Of course, that didn’t keep us from comparing notes about boys, and they always consulted with me regarding their boyfriend’s cocks before asking them out. The boys knew this and used me to send ‘messages’ to the girls they were horny for. It got so bad for a while that two boys actually came up to me in the locker room during PE to show off their manhood. They stood in front of me with their hard cocks in their hands and actually told me to tell their girlfriends how big they were. It was a wet dream for me- and a laugh for the girls. Of course, neither of those boys got anything out of their effort. Their cocks were just too small, and I was able to warn their ‘girlfriends’ before the disappointment.

David and I played around a little bit during middle school like all young teenagers do. As he and I were entering the throes of puberty, we often compared sizes, hair and other characteristics. Of course, when we found that we could make stuff come out of our cocks, we thought that we had invented a fun new game. It was a short step to helping each other cum, and we haven’t looked back since.

There were many happy days of sex separating our early puberty from our marriage. I can remember endless nights and afternoons of play. I can easily recall countless images of my lover naked, or almost as good, frolicking in his tight Hanes underwear. I lusted for his body at the mere scent of him. I admit it: I had it bad.

Oh how I admired his lean body. He sported shortly cropped blond hair that complemented his tanned body. His cock was enormous on him, like mine was on me, since we were both skinny teens trying hard to grow up to our man-sized cocks. I knew that penis as well as I knew my own. The ridge under the soft foreskin, the vein along the top of the shaft, the soft glans and moist eye, the hardness sheathed by the silky skin of his manhood: All were intimate parts of my lover. The scent of his sack and the warmth of his sperm were nearly as familiar to me as my own. I admired his body then because it brought me great pleasure.

My joy is filled to bursting at the memory of our first evening of intercourse. That wonderful feeling of his manhood filling the space inside me, and his rushing sperm coating my boiling insides shall stay with me always. Tightly linked to that memory is the feeling of my cock inside him as he returned the favor and gave me the pleasure that I didn’t deserve.

During our sophomore year as we prepared for a project in our Biology class I thought of putting a slide of our fresh sperm under the microscope. We were alone in the science lab after normal school hours with special permission of our teacher. We just wanted so see what it looked like, so David and I wacked off together in the back of the science lab. We mixed a drop of my sperm with a drop of his sperm and placed it under the microscope lens. My lord, we must have been the most fertile boys in the whole school. There were sperm cells swimming everywhere!

While I was staring through the lens at all the sperm swimming in every direction, I felt my lover grasp my cock. A moment later I felt the sharp edge of a dissection scalpel running across my pubes, shaving them away as it went. I dared not move, but the feeling of jeopardy started a surge of adrenaline in me that I later recognized as the start of my darkest fantasy.

David must have recognized my arousal because he laid the scalpel aside after he had shaved away the bush of hair atop my penis. Finally daring to move, I pulled my eyes from the rubber cups of the microscope to watch my lover slowly engulf my intensely erect cock in his mouth. It was the most intense orgasm of my life, and the beginning of the end for my manhood. I didn’t know what it was called, but I knew that I someday wanted to feel the pain of my cock coming off.

Of course, the shallow cuts David left behind with the scalpel reminded me of the potential pain of that procedure. They took days to heal, but his loving care during that time confirmed that he was truly mine. Memories of his soft fingers rubbing soothing gel into my shaved crotch still visit me in my best dreams.

I still keep my crotch shaved for David now. David chose to take the sign of my manhood’s maturity from me. Who am I to allow it to return?

The day of our wedding was a forgone conclusion. We had been tagged as taken by every one of our friends since we were juniors in high school. It only seemed natural to make it ‘official’. So, as soon as it became legal for two gay men to be married, David and I quickly made arrangements for the ceremony.

I was a little confused at first because David actually wanted two ceremonies. The first was very secretive and would be the official marriage, but the second was to be a Betazed styled ceremony a-la Star Trek. Of course, as everyone knows, Betazed ceremonies require the participants and audience to be nude. The very naughtiness of that idea was enough to make us laugh for weeks but the thought of David’s mother naked was enough to sober us right back up again. David’s family was very wealthy and agreed to cover the expense of our marriage ceremonies. Frankly, my job as lifeguard doesn’t allow for much extra spending money.

Over 350 of our friends and their families responded to the invitation to our second, and only public, ceremony. David would not reveal the plans for the first ceremony, but the two events were separated by almost four months. I couldn’t understand the reason for the secrecy, or the extended separation between the ceremonies, but I trust David in all things. I would have been fine with an intimate ceremony, but I sensed by the growing anticipation that something more was in the offing.

Our first ceremony was to be attended by our closest friends. A small group of 50 friends were quietly invited. All accepted, although I wasn’t sure what they were agreeing to attend when we began to receive the RSVPs back in the mail.

The day itself dawned bright and cheery. As tradition dictates, neither of us could see our groom after midnight of the night before the ceremony. I was horny as hell but did not even consider relieving my incredible drive. My balls boiled with a week of pent up cum and the testosterone of a man in his early twenties surged through my veins. I was almost desperate enough to have screwed anything that wore pants at that point. I looked forward to some heavy sex tonight and wanted to save myself for my lover’s pleasure later. Little did I know what was in store for me before darkness fell again.

We had agreed to have the ceremony at a private hall. I was informed, as I entered the building, that I was to wait in an anteroom next to the left entrance of the hall. I was told that David was already waiting in another room near the opposite entrance. David’s first marriage gift to me was a beautiful oriental styled silk robe. The robe was cut slightly above mid-thigh and the silk had been dyed a dark crimson. I was told to put it on with nothing underneath for the ceremony. I did so, removing my suit and anticipating the thrill of being naked under a single layer of silk in front of our guests. I knew my cock would go instantly hard as soon as the silk touched it, but I relished the feeling anyway as the blood surged into my glans with the cool silk rubbing across it.

When the time came, I followed my surging manhood out of the anteroom. At the first strains of the marital march I took my first step toward my beloved. The revelation was suddenly complete as I took in the crowd of our friends, all dressed in matching robes of blackest silk. Across the hall, my eyes locked with those of my fiancé wearing his crimson silk robe to match mine. I noticed the bulge of his erection leading his path down the short aisle to where the minister and our wedding party waited for us.

It was only as I turned toward my lover at the base of the aisle that I noticed a heavy wooden table waiting in front of the minister. Two knives laid side by side, their handles tied beautifully with white ribbon. I couldn’t imagine what they were for, but the thoughts of that day long ago where I submitted to my boyfriend’s loving hand flashed before my eyes. The crowd behind us faded out of our consciousness as we existed only for each other.

We met in the middle, David and I. Facing each other across the low wooden table, we held hands while David explained the full measure of his gift to me, and mine to him. This wonderful gift, and this horrible sacrifice was going to be given today. This was the cost of our happiness.

Not knowing what else to do, and never considering for a moment to flee, I nodded briefly before meeting my lover in a long kiss over the center of the table. The hall was silent as our best men untied and removed our silken crimson robes to reveal our nudity to everyone present.

Still holding hands, David and I broke our kiss to watch the preparations for the marriage ceremony and our sacrifices to each other. Our best men untied the bows around the handles of the knives to reveal two ribbons of pure white silk. Unseen before, but now evident to me was a ring of purest gold tied to the end of the long ribbons. The inside of the rings were each edged with sharp barbs.

Each best man handed us the short silk ribbon and explained that we should tie it around our lover’s penis as close to his body as possible. The ribbons were evidently hiding an elastic cord because I felt the subtle tightening on my cock after David cinched it tight. The silk began to bite into the skin of my penis to a point that it was uncomfortable but not yet painful. The blood was clearly trapped in my cock since the glans darkened slightly but the jeopardy of our situation caused me to enjoy the hardest erection I could remember up to that time.

Suddenly, the intent of the golden rings was made clear as we slipped a ring over the head of each other’s cock. We exchanged the beginning of our vows, “With these rings we do wed” as they slid on easily, but the barbs were obviously intended to keep them from slipping easily back off.

David’s Best Man retracted my lover’s foreskin to allow the ring to nestle behind the corona of his glans. Since I was cut as an infant, my man only needed to make sure that the ring was settled closely behind my glans. I could feel the barbs rub there on the sensitive skin behind the ridge and dig into the frenelum under the eye on the underside. My man handed the end of my ribbon to David as I accepted David’s leash. We were instructed to tie each leash as tightly as possible to a small eyebolt for that purpose on our side of the table.

David followed the instruction very enthusiastically, pulling my cock tightly toward him and tying the ribbon off in a fancy bow. The tension pulled me against the table and pressed my cock against the smooth surface of the wood. My scrotum nestled protectively into a concave fur-lined cavity on the edge of the table. The tension of the ribbon had now firmly set the ring barbs firmly into the skin of my cock shaft. My woody was stretched as tightly as possible across the wooden table, ready now for the kiss of my lover’s blade. David and I had long experimented with some gentle sexual torture in the past, so the pain was not unbearable and I was resolved to accept anything that David wanted to do to me.

I was somewhat gentler with David. I drew my lover toward me by pulling the ribbon and his leashed cock toward it’s demise. I tied the ribbon firmly to the table and lovingly wiped a drop of blood from the glans that had snuck past the constricting golden ring. I could see the pain of the ring clearly painted across his features, but we were both committed to each other regardless of the momentary discomfort or the certainty of the coming pain.

The lesson of the minister was long-winded and forgettable. We stood there, bound by our perfect golden rings while the minister droned on and a singer belted out our special song. Altogether, we were probably staring into each other’s eyes for fifteen minutes while our cocks deadened from the constricting bands at the base and bled gently under the rings.

The moment of our remaining vows finally arrived. Of course, the nature of the final vow required us to give them simultaneously with the sacrifice of our partner’s manhood.

Picking up the knives, our Best Men handed each of us a blade. The Damascus steel blades were weighty, but keen and obviously very expensively made. Both of us took the handle into our right hands and, with the guidance of our men, placed the sharp edge at the base of our lover’s cock. The feel of the sharp blade caused my penis to surge, drawing a drop of blood at the slight touch.

To prevent any hesitation, our best men covered each of our hands with their own. I somehow knew that we wouldn’t be permitted to stop once they felt us begin the cut.

Looking into my lover’s eyes I accepted everything that he was, and everything that I was about to give him. I saw him realize the same as he began the movement to remove my cock from my body. The pain was immediate and severe as the supremely keen edge of the knife separated my skin and began to bite into the meat of my manhood. The blood oozed only slightly because of the extended period with the fancy tourniquet applied at the base. I think that the time had also served to deaden the pain, but the tears came anyway.

I could see the pain on David’s face as well. Just as I thought, his best man did not allow me any hesitation. His hand pressing down on mine, I completed the cut to see my new Husband’s manhood spring away from his body toward me. A moment more, and my gift to my Husband separated from my body and almost eagerly leapt toward him. All my hopes for sex were for naught. Consumed in my need for my lover, I had given up all control of myself to him.

Four months later saw us walking hand-in-hand down an aisle of the same public hall. This time there was no table and we were surrounded by almost 500 of our closest friends, family and their friends. As usual, the friendly gay guys get the best turnout- but I swear I didn’t know half of the people who were in the hall that day. Of course, as a Betazed styled ceremony, everyone was fully nude excepting only jewelry. I couldn’t help but admire the curve of the occasional nicely formed buttock. Some of the men couldn’t help themselves; they stood stoically erect as the wedding party passed by. Surrounded by so much nude flesh, many of the men in the crowd succumbed to their basest desires. I couldn’t blame them either. There were a LOT of very cute guys in attendance of all ages from teens to twenties. There were even a few older guys that were hot too. Of course, the teen boys spent all their time eyeing the teen girls in the audience. I also saw two of the teen boys who spent their time during the ceremony checking out all the other teen guys.

Of course, everyone had heard of the gift that David and I had given each other. Most didn’t believe it until they finally saw the proof. You could see their eyes travel down our chests until they reached our crotch. Then, widening slightly, the eyes took in the truth of our manhood being removed at the base.

Both of us were fully erect as we proceeded down the aisle, but nothing of that excitement protruded from our bodies. The only difference between us now was the fact that David sported a trimmed bush above his fractional stub while I shaved my pubes fully away. Our balls gently swung as we walked together, hand in hand, to our future as husband and husband.