Santa's New Elf


By: Paolo

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[GAY] [NULLIFICATION] [MINOR]

An Archive Christmas Story for 2003, dedicated to all those fascinating sorts out there who dress up Santa Claus every year! In this tale, Santa and his Favorite Elf recruit a replacement on Christmas Eve. There's just one slight complication to being an elf...


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Santa’s New Elf

On the evening of December 24, 2003, Christmas Eve, at the North Pole, it was business as usual! The sleigh was loaded down, the reindeer in their harnesses and standing at the ready, and Rudolph’s nose shining brightly through the snow as it flurried around. Old Mr. Claus, Kris Kringle himself, was ready for his one long night of work. Mrs. Claus waved from the window, and the old man waved back.

“Ready for takeoff?”

“Ready, Santa!” An elf bellowed, in a high and clear voice.

“Runway all clear?”

BOOM!

“It is NOW, boss,” another elf called back, shouldering his muzzle loader and giving a loud whistle. Instantly, a couple of polar bears dragged the carcass of the moose that the elf had just shot off of the runway.

“Damn moose,” Dasher muttered.

“Oh, I don’t know,” Dancer replied, “I sort of like moose.”

“YOU would,” Vixen sneered.

“On the rag again, Vixen?” Prancer laughed, “Rotten luck, ehhh?”

“Fuck you,” Vixen snapped.

“You wish,” Prancer retorted, as the reigns were snapped hard.

“Ohhh, whip me again, you fat bastard!” One of the reindeer jeered.

“Oh, shut the hell up and fly,” Santa shouted, shoving THE LIST back into his pocket, “We don’t want to disappoint the kiddies, now, do we?”

“Screw the kiddies,” Comet complained, as the nine reindeer attainted liftoff speed and pulled the jolly old man and his cargo into the starry night sky.

“Am I the ONLY straight deer here?” Cupid asked, as they banked to the left and headed for Alaska, their first stop of the long, temporally distorted night. Prancer laughed at him and Donner burped.

“I hate relativistic time dilations,” he complained.

“How else are we supposed to hit every single house where a good kid lives, then?” Blitzen asked.

“It’s getting easier every year, though,” Rudolph said over his shoulder, his red nose glowing. “There’s not too many good ones left!”

“HELLS BELLS!” Santa then cried out, “Thank you, Rudy! I almost forgot! Dammit! Must be getting old and senile!” Then he pulled out his cell phone. “Mamma? Yes, it’s me already. Yes, dear…yes, I miss you already. Listen, Mamma, I forgot to get the other list. No, I have THE LIST, I mean the OTHER LIST, dear. Yes….yes….THAT list! Do send Tommy up with it, won’t you? I think Prudence will be more than happy to fly him up. No, we’re not too far yet…,”

The other nine reindeer laughed. Prudence was on the B-team, or rather, the emergency reserve list of flying reindeer in case one of them got sick.

“Prudee’s bringing Tommy!” Dasher cried.

“That outta be good,” Dancer said, “Tommy gets sick every time he even sees the sleigh!”

Prancer nodded. “Poor Tommy. He never did like heights. It’s cruel making him come along.”

“Yeah, but he’s in charge of new acquisitions this year,” Vixen reminded them. “Someone has to do it.”

“Acquisitions, or withdrawals?” Comet joked, and they all laughed.

“Keep it down, you lot of flying beef jerky! I’m trying to talk to Mamma!” Santa bellowed. “Now, dear, just send Tommy along with THE SACK and the special list. Yes, yes, that’s fine. He can wear his usual uniform, yes, what? Yes it’s cold up here! No, I don’t care that he’s the cutest one of the lot, so what if he falls off? He won’t fall off; besides, I’ll just replace him, too. What? No, he’s retiring, we told you. If I didn’t know better, I’d say you two were up to something!”
Santa laughed. He knew damn good and well that the Mrs. hadn’t entertained THOSE kinds of randy thoughts since World War 1.

And even if she had, Tommy (or any other elf for that matter) wouldn’t be able to do a whole lot for her.

This didn’t bother the old fat man, however. His face grew even redder as they flew on, and it wasn’t from the wind. “Tommy’s on his way,” he called out, just as the team dived sharply.

“Boeing 747 at 2 o’clock!” Donner then yelled happily.

“Incoming!” The team cried in unison, as the sleigh banked sharply. Right on queue, the nine tiny reindeer took a shit all over the windshield of the jet!

The reindeer laughed and flipped their tails at them as Santa waved.

“Did you see that?” The Captain asked his copilot.

“No, and neither did YOU,” the copilot replied.

“Now what were we talking about?” Blitzen asked, once they’d gone back to normal cruising speed.

“Tommy the Elf coming along on Prudence with THE SACK!” Rudolph reminded them.

“Ooohhh, THE SACK!” The rest of them cried.

“Is it time for replacements already?” Dasher asked, “I hadn’t noticed.”

“I had,” Prancer commented.

“YOU would,” Vixen said sourly.

“Bitch,” Prancer replied rather airily.

“Like YOU have room to talk,” she retorted. “Who’d believe it? A flying gay reindeer. Shit, I need to find a new job!”

“I was just TRYING to get at the fact that Tommy’s bringing THE SACK tonight because it’s time to round up some of the more bad boys already. I can’t believe it. Didn’t we just haul a lot of them in last year?” Prancer went on.

“No, we left them to suffer in main Society,” Dasher answered. “You must have missed that, since you were busy fucking cows over in Minnesota that year. I think the boss used every toy in his arsenal on them!”

“I have NEVER fucked a cow,” Prancer denied it.

“Liar,” Santa called out, “I had to drag your faggot ass out of so many barns last year that I seriously thought about a nice, short trip to the vet for you!” He laughed again, looking around. “Tommy should be here any minute,” he added.

They all laughed again. “Talk about the pot and the kettle!” Most of them thought.

“Ooohhh!” The team whistled, “Tommy’s coming!”

“Shut the hell up!” Santa said, but there was no malice in his voice. It was common knowledge among the reindeer, the elves, the moose, the polar bears…and everyone BUT the Mrs., … that Santa was rather fond of some of the elves! After all, the elves were all very passive and obedient, and all were very hard workers who were eager to please the old fat man. That and none of them were over 5 feet tall. Besides, ol’ Kris hadn’t had any from the Mrs. since Teddy Roosevelt had been the President of the United States. By the time that Hoover had taken over and the stock market had gone to hell in a hand basket, the old man was getting VERY horny. By the time Teddy’s cousin Franklin had taken over and little Adolph (who’d never gotten a present from Santa in his life!) was making all that trouble in Europe, no elf was safe from the jolly old soul’s ministrations!

“First stop!” He then cried, and the team gracefully landed on a rooftop. Santa jumped out, grabbed his sack, and plunged down the chimney. By the time he returned, the reindeer were all looking up expectantly.

“Here he comes!” Cupid shouted.

Santa looked skyward and saw a single reindeer falling out of the sky with a solitary rider. She landed gracefully on the rooftop alongside the Team and tossed her head, shaking off the snow.

“Hello, Prudence,” Santa greeted her. Then his eyes met with those of her rider. “Hello, Tommy,” he leered at the elf.

“Hiya, boss,” Tommy replied, his piping and clear voice the only sound disturbing the quiet Alaskan night. Then he looked down at his lap. “Sorry I forgot. I was so busy packing up the toys for the GOOD kids! Please don’t be mad at me.” He looked almost ready to cry.

Santa walked over and held his arms out, and Tommy was scooped up off of Prudence’s back as the old man swung him around. “Now how could I be angry with YOU?” Santa asked, kissing the elf’s cheek and tickling his ribs. Tommy giggled, his fear of heights forgotten.

“Pervert,” Blitzen muttered.

“He is not!” Comet said.

“Well he LOOKS like one, carrying on with a little elf like that in public!”

“That little elf has underwear that’s older than you are,” Comet reminded him.

“Yeah, well, they ALL look little boys to me, too,” Vixen commented.

“Tha’s the whole point of it,” Dasher chipped in, “You don’t want a workshop full of old, ugly elves, do you?”

“I know “I” don’t,” Prancer added wistfully.

“Do you mind?” Santa asked, and the Team just looked at them. “Don’t talk about Tommy like he’s not even here.”

“But he isn’t all here,” Prancer snorted.

“Fuck you!” Tommy yelled, suddenly struggling to get out of Santa’s arms. The old man held him, though. Santa certainly looked old, but he didn’t act it. The Magic that ran the North Pole saw to that. No old man that was fat and out of shape could make his grueling schedule of sliding up and down millions of chimneys in one night! Yes, the Magic saw to him.

Just as it saw to Tommy.

“Fuck me with WHAT?” Prancer taunted him, snickering and wagging his tail at him.

Tommy’s face went even redder than the wind had already made it. “You should get HIM neutered, boss,” Tommy said to Santa. “I hate him!”

“Misery loves company,” Prancer replied, looking rather smug. “Of course I guess there’s something to the cute little elf thing, you’re not all bad.”

“You outta know,” Vixen groaned.

“Sicko,” Rudolph muttered.

“Shut up!” Tommy yelled again.

“Yeah, shut up, you lop-eared elf-fucker,” Comet said.

“Takes one to know one!”

“Language!” Santa snapped, and they all laughed.

“Sorry,” Everyone replied.

“Now, Tommy,” Santa said, holding the small elf as if he were no more than a child. “Did you bring THE SACK?”

Tommy nodded. In fact, Tommy WASN’T much more than a child in the jolly old man’s arms – in weight. For all appearances, the elf looked like a normal and healthy ten year old boy. He was dressed in a heavy tunic of rich maroon velvet, trimmed in soft white fur. His warm leggings were a deep green, and his size-5 feet were clad in soft black leather half-boots. He wore green mittens that matched his leggings, and a hat just like Santa’s that revealed his pointed ears. His ice blue eyes sparkled with mischief, and his rosy cheeks looked to be sprinkled with silver and gold glitter.

He looked like the perfect little boy who was expecting, and hardly able to wait for, Christmas.

But Tommy wasn’t a little boy.

He wasn’t even a ‘boy’, by dictionary standards.

He was an elf.

In fact, he was Santa’s favorite elf.

And he was looking at retirement after a long and mostly happy career in toy making – among other things!

“I have it right here, sir!” Tommy replied happily. “Is THIS the house?”

“Oh, no,” Santa said, “In this house lives a good boy. We’re not taking him.”

“Oh, OK,” Tommy sighed, looking a bit disappointed as the old man returned him to Prudence’s back. He settled into the ornate leather saddle and leaned down to grasp her neck. “Guess I’m just anxious.”

Santa laughed. “Patience, Tommy,” he reminded him.

“Elves are very patient,” Prudence said.

“They HAVE to be patient,” Prancer whispered.

“I heard that!” Tommy snapped.

“Haley’s comet comes once every 75 years, and so does Tommy,” Blitzen snickered. Prancer nodded and shouldered his friend. Vixen leaned over and bit him.

“Watch it, bitch!” Blitzen warned her.

“I don’t come once every 75 years, I’ll have you know,” Tommy said loftily, winking at Santa, who blushed.

“Amazing. There’s no reindeer hooked to it, we might say, but his sleigh still flies,” Prancer mused. “You must be a talented man, Santa!”

“He is,” Tommy retorted hotly. “Just because I don’t have a...,”

Santa cleared his throat loudly and got back into the sleigh. “Move out!” He called. “Time’s a’wastin’!”

“What happened to the ‘on Dasher, on Dancer…etc., bit?” Tommy asked, as he flew alongside Santa.

“I save that for last,” Santa replied, grinning at him. “Tommy,” he then sighed, as they headed for the next house, “Are you really sure you want to retire? I mean, you’ve been my trusty right-hand man now for, what, almost a hundred years?”

Tommy looked away, his perfectly angelic face suddenly looking very old and tired. For just a moment, the façade of the happy child with pointy ears crumbled. “I’m not a man,” he mumbled.

“No, you’re not,” Santa said kindly, “But you also know WHY you’re not,” he hinted.

“I know,” Tommy sighed, “A long time ago, once upon a time, and all that rot, I was a very bad little boy.”

“And what happens to bad little boys?” Santa encouraged him, as they landed on yet another roof.

“They go in THE SACK,” Tommy answered happily, hopping down off of Prudence’s back. “THIS house, boss?” He asked anxiously. “Please? Please? Please?” He was almost dancing in place with excitement.

The old man nodded and gestured at the chimney. “After you, Tommy,” he laughed, and the small elf slid on down with Santa in hot pursuit. The Team watched them go.

“Tommy’s gonna collect one here, huh?” Rudolph asked.

“It looks like it,” Donner replied.

“Bet that boy’ll wish he’d never been bad,” Dasher mused.

On the rooftop, the Team waited. There was some prancing and pawing of each little hoof…and well, all that stuff.

 

A small cloud of soot and ash belched out of the fireplace of the house, and a second later, a small elf and a fat man slid out of it and rolled across the floor. They got up, dusted off, and Tommy handed Santa the sack full of toys. The fat old man set a few under the tree and grinned, picking up a cookie from the small table nearby.

“Macaroons?” He asked Tommy.

“No, thanks, they’ll go right to my hips,” Tommy replied. “Maybe there’s a diet soda in the fridge?”

“You could do with a little more meat on your bones, boy, I’ve been telling you that for fifty years now!”

“I have to watch my figure, you know,” the elf grinned at him.

“I’ve got all of little Janie’s gifts laid out, now it’s time for YOU to get to work on her brother,” Santa reminded Tommy.

Tommy grinned at him and headed out of the family room, where the tall Christmas tree cast a warm, yellow glow with its twinkling lights. For just a moment, he was reminded of splendid Christmas tree lit only on Christmas Eve with real candles, and buckets of water standing by in case of an accident. He remembered presents, things in his stocking, and for just a moment, he was melancholy. But then it passed.

He padded on up the stairs, THE SACK clutched firmly in his hand, and headed down the hallway until he came to a door with a poster on it that read, “MY ROOM, MY MESS, MY BUSINESS!”

He opened the door and switched on a light, kicking the door shut as he stepped in. He snapped his fingers, and the door made a sucking sound as it sealed. He grinned and looked at the bed. Before him lay what looked like half of the clutter in the known World, along with a great deal of laundry strung about. Tommy sniffed. “Yep, a boy’s room,” he mumbled in disgust, cracking his knuckles with a wicked grin on his beardless face. Then he checked HIS list. THE OTHER LIST…one could say, the Especially Naughty List!

James Milton, older brother of Janie (who had a great many toys under the tree now, thank you very much!), sixteen year old boy, newly licensed driver, and overall jerk of a big brother, was sleeping soundly in his bed. His blankets were pulled up to his nose, and he was lying on his back. Tommy noticed the tent in his blankets along about his midsection, and the elf’s wicked grin spread into a full-blown smile. James’ eyes were moving, and Tommy knew that he was dreaming. In fact, the elf knew what he was dreaming about as he employed a bit of North Pole Magic.

“Thinking about twisting Barbie’s head off, are we?” Tommy mused, “Well, Barbie’s safe THIS year,” he thought to himself, as he laid his sack down on the floor and reached into the pocket of his velvet tunic. Then he jumped up on the bed. “I’d be thinking about Ken if I were you!”

“WAKE UP, ASSWIPE!” He then shouted.

James muttered something incoherent.

“I said WAKE UP, dammit!” Tommy yelled again, planting a leather boot aside of James’ head.

James jerked awake and sat up in bed immediately.

“Wha’d’fuck?” He muttered, glancing around the room in surprise and rubbing his jaw. Then he noticed the little boy standing on the foot of his bed.

“Who the hell’r you?!” James demanded, “And how’d you get in my room, kid?”

“Awww, don’t Jamesey believe in Magic no more?” Tommy asked, his fingers twitching in his pocket. “The name’s Tommy, and I’m here to see you!”

“Look kid, I don’ know who you are, or how you got in here,” James warned him, rubbing at his sore jaw, “But you better get the hell out, now, boy!”

Tommy smiled again. “Take a closer look, dumbass,” he said coldly, adjusting his hat. “You know everyone in this neck of the woods. Small town. Do you know me?”

James thought for a bit. “No,” he said carefully, studying Tommy. The elf then moved his hat, revealing his pointed ears.

“And your doors are locked, the dog is asleep in the kitchen, and the security system didn’t go off. Now, what do you see and how do you think I got in? It’s Christmas Eve, after all, Jamesey.” He touched his ear for good measure.

“This ain’t real,” James laughed. “You’re too little to be Santa. And besides, there is NO Santa! I stopped believin’ in that shit when I was eight years old...”

“…When you didn’t the Nintendo you asked for,” Tommy added dramatically, rolling his eyes. “How many times do you have to tell ‘em? Jesus, Mary and Joseph!” He swore, “He only brings toys to the good little girls and boys, shithead!” Tommy snapped. “THAT year, you punched little Dickey Stevens in the nose so hard that he had to have surgery on it! Dickey got your Nintendo, by the way.” He had to tack that bit on.

James glared at him. “This is a dream. Some kind of subconscious thing, that’s it! There’s no way in hell that a foul-mouthed elf is standin’ on my bed in the middle of the night and threatening me!”

“Think again, and get in THE SACK, pal,” Tommy ordered him, holding up THE SACK and pointing.

“The what?!”

“You heard me, THE SACK. And you can bet there ain’t no toys in it! All of the bad little boys, well, not ALL of them, or we’d be much overstaffed! But the worst ones, like you, Jamesey, go in THE SACK. They don’t get toys. They get a new life instead!” Tommy smiled at him.

James looked at the intruder and rubbed his eyes. When he opened them, the elf was still there. And he was smiling. It was very disturbing smile, and it reminded James very much of a low budget slasher-movie star.

“I ain’t getting’ in no sack,” James replied smugly.

“Fine, have it your way,” Tommy shrugged, and his boot flashed out so fast that James never even saw the blow that broke his nose coming! “I’ll leave Dickey a note about that, too,” Tommy added, as the boy clapped his hands to his face. Blood was pouring out of his nose, and it was clearly broken. “Dickey’s getting lots of nice things this year,” he said. “Poor kid, you big bully!”

“Whuhhh…whu’hell? Yooo bwoke by noze!” James coughed.

“So now you know how it feels, asshole. Going to come quietly now?” Tommy asked.

James nodded.

“Get up!”

“But…but…,” the shocked boy protested.

Tommy rolled his eyes. “I know, I know, ‘but I’m naked!’ You’re going to say. Like I care! I can see the damn thing poking the blankets up the way it is. Well, we won’t be worrying about that too much longer, though.”

“Huh?”

“This is taking too damn long,” Tommy said through clenched teeth. He then yanked the blankets back, revealing a shivering and very naked teenage boy. He stared at him.

James was fully erect, even aroused, and his cock was a good seven inches long and quite thick. He had an ample growth of black hair around it, and even in the dim light of the room, Tommy could see that he was quite proud of it. Below it hung two very round and large balls, and Tommy could tell that they’d recently been put to use by the stains on the sheets. He was well muscled, and every ounce the model stud that he thought he was!

For a moment, the sight distracted Tommy. James noticed it, and he took the opportunity to land a kick right in Tommy’s crotch! The elf blinked and just looked at him. “You wanna try a move that WORKS now?”

“Huh?” He gasped, wondering that the elf wasn’t curled up and gasping at what he’d done! He’d just kicked him in the…in the…but nothing had happened?! While James was trying to comprehend what was going on, Tommy’s hand flashed out of his pocket, brandishing a length of red tinsel like a lasso. It ensnared the startled boy, and Tommy bound him hand and foot with it before he could even get a move in. “Magic,” Tommy reminded him, “Go ahead and scream, I know you want to. No one will hear you though.” Then he snapped his fingers. “In fact, they’ve already forgotten all about you,” he added.

“How?”

“You remember little Robby Stewart? Vanished without a trace, Christmas, during your seventh grade year, your time?”

James shook his head.

“My point exactly,” Tommy clarified. “You don’t think we can go off leaving evidence, now, do you? I have to make sure that no one even knows you ever existed.”

“But…mby fambleey,” James protested, sounding very nasal and sore as his nose bled.

“Your family can’t wait to be rid of your sorry ass,” Tommy corrected him, reaching into his pocket again. In his free hand, he held up a strand of icicle decoration. He snapped it a few times, and it TWANGED! loudly. He then flicked his wrist, and the icicle shot out like a frenzied snake to bind itself tightly around James’ genitals. The boy screamed.

James stared in horror as his erection faded and the icicle tightened its binding grip. It burned as it dug into his skin. Very slowly, his genitals began to turn blue and cold. “Whut…whut’s happuhnding?” He gasped, hardly able to comprehend it as he struggled with the red tinsel that bound his hands.

“Part of the Magic, Jamesey,” Tommy explained, “You see, it’s all part of the job requirement,” he went on, moving so that he was standing over the weakly struggling teen. He edged closer, so that the crotch of his snug green tights was right under James’ broken nose. “Look close,” the elf ordered him.

James, who was beginning to panic, as well as be very annoyed at being called “Jamesey”, looked close. It took a moment for it to soak into his head, but when it did, his eyes went wide.

The crotch of the elf’s tight little green suit was very smooth. In fact, there wasn’t so much as a bump. He looked down at the icicle that had ensnared his own manhood, back at Tommy, and then he slowly shook his head. “You ain’t…you ain’t got no…you’re a…a…,” he choked in disbelief. “…and mby…mby cock’n mballs’r gewtting’ blue!”

“They’ll get bluer before we get there, trust me,” Tommy said. “You won’t be needing them anymore, anyways.”

“NO!”

“Get in THE SACK,” Tommy repeated ominously, waving a long finger at the boy. Pain shot up through James’ groin just then, pain such as he’d never known before. The icicle was digging in, cutting off the blood flow to his prize possessions trapped below it!

And then James Milton screamed.

But no one heard him.

Well, almost no one.

Up on the roof, Santa checked his watch and smiled serenely.

“Take one last look,” Tommy told the boy, who by now had devolved into a bleeding, trembling, sobbing wreck of a boy. Then Tommy snapped his fingers again. “No one will ever remember how bad you were,” he said softly, comfortingly, “Now that you’re gone!”

The last thing that James saw, as Tommy shoved his head down into THE SACK, was a dusty room full of old junk and forgotten things. It looked like the storage room at school, where one put things that would probably never be used again. There was not a trace to be seen that a teenage boy had once inhabited it. Even the smell of laundry that needed to be done was gone. Once again, he screamed, but Tommy shoved a satin bulb ornament into his mouth, effectively gagging him. Then he closed the door and went back to the fireplace, THE SACK bumping along on the stairs behind him. BUMP, BUMP, BUMP! And then laying a finger aside of his nose, and giving a nod, up the chimney they rose!

“’Bout time,” Rudolph observed, as they all took flight.

Tommy adjusted the seemingly empty sack over his shoulder as Prudence flew along beside of them. “He gave me a bit of a fight,” the elf explained.

Santa laughed. “That won’t last long,” he smiled, and Tommy nodded. Looking back, he remembered that it hadn’t taken long at all for all of ‘the fight’ to go out of him, either. THE SACK twitched a bit, but Tommy ignored it.

 

The next several thousand homes were filled with good little boys and girls, and Tommy didn’t have much to do. He entertained himself by reciting Clement Moore’s “The Night Before Christmas”, much to the chagrin of the Team.

“Must you?” Comet asked.

“I must,” Tommy smiled at him, looking for all the World like the beatific little child that he most certainly was NOT.

“We only have to put up with him for one more night,” Blitzen added.

“Thank God!” Vixen agreed.

“You’ll all miss me, and you know it,” Tommy said with a grin.

“I’ll miss you, Tommy,” Prudence defended him. “You’re such a good elf!”

“Santa will miss you, that’s for SURE!” Rudolph agreed, and Tommy blushed brightly.

“Jealous?”

“Hell no! Why would any MALE be jealous of looking like a prepubescent boy for a century, not be able to jerk off, unable to pee standing up, have no balls or sex drive, and having to be Santa’s bum-boy for all eternity?” Prancer exclaimed. “And add to that the ridiculous costume you have to wear?!” Then he thought about it, and shifted his hind legs. “Damn, I’ve gotten myself all worked up!”

Comet, just in front of him in the lineup, glanced over his shoulder nervously.

“It’s not so bad,” Tommy said, “You get used to it.”

“Let’s hope that one in THE SACK gets used to it,” Rudolph commented. “He sounded like a live one.”

Tommy sighed. “He’s definitely got too much testosterone in his system. A bit of the ol’ Magic will fix him right up, though. I’d imagine that icicle has done a number on him by now, too.”

The Team shivered, all except for Vixen and Prudence. They seemed rather amused.

“You could have let Vixxy here bite ‘em off,” Prancer suggested.

“Now you’re talkin’!” She agreed happily.

“Now, now, you now the routine, Team. You have to use the Magic icicles, and they have to be proper eunuchs when we get back to The North Pole. By the time we fall back out of this time-warp thingy, ol’ Jamesey here will look like all of ten years old, even if he don’t FEEL like it!” Tommy explained. “That’ll take some time.” Then he grinned, a wicked grin out of place on his smooth, angelic face. “A very long, very frustrating time!”

“That’s cruel,” Dasher said, just as Santa popped out of the chimney and they mounted up to the sky again, much like the dry leaves before the wild hurricane fly, meet with an obstacle…and all that other rubbish.

 

Before the night was over, Tommy’s SACK was quite full. It didn’t appear full, however. It looked like an ordinary toy sack, but it held a cargo much greater than Santa’s sack. As they flew on, visiting house after house, Tommy was called upon a few more times to do his job. Many of the bad boys he dragged out of bed put up a good fight, but none of them were a match for the elf. Usually, after the icicles had done their job, they simply gave up and allowed their heads to be shoved down into the Magical SACK. No one would miss them. No one would even remember them.

After all, they were bad little boys.

The lot of them.

And Santa had to get his staff replacements somehow!

The first rays of dawn were just brightening the eastern skies when the jolly old man cried out, “MERRY CHRISTMAS TO ALL, AND TO ALL, A GOOD NIGHT!”

There were several groans from THE SACK, but no one paid them any attention as the ten tiny reindeer, one jolly old man, and one very tired little elf set their sights for home.

 

“He’s back!” An elf cried out, as the entire staff of the North Pole came rushing out to greet Santa and the Team as the sleigh touched down. It was the usual happy affair, and when it was done, Santa called for everyone’s attention.

“As you all know,” he told the assembled staff and Mrs. Claus, “We have quite a few staff replacements this year. It seems that he amount of bad little boys out there is on the rise, sadly. Without further delay, Tommy, if you would, please?”

Tommy nodded and dumped out his SACK. As he shook it, several dozen bewildered boys tumbled out of it to land shivering in the snow. It was purely Magical, how an ordinary sack could seem to hold so many captured bad boys! A great many of them were naked, and Mrs. Claus blushed. Still, they were quite helpless. The Magical tinsel that bound them refused to let go, and most of them were weak and banged up from the fights they’d lost with Tommy! Squirming in pain and humiliation, they awaited to see what their fate was going to be.

And of course, the icicles had done their jobs.

As the boys were all dragged to their feet and lined up, their darkened and withered manhoods fell away, leaving only a puff of snow as they hit the ground and vanished. There was not a trace left on any of them that they’d ever been born as real males, and they were all beautifully healed up. One by one, they all looked up at their angelic looking captors and realized that what Tommy had told them was all true. A few of them began to cry.

“Not so tough now, are they?” Santa asked.

“Nope,” Tommy agreed. “Ready, Santa?”

“If you would be so kind as to do the honors, Tommy,” the jolly old man agreed.

“A’right, boys, here’s how it is,” Tommy shouted, kicking snow at the lot of them. “You’re not having a bad dream. This is real. You all really WERE abducted by a mad elf in the middle of the night on Christmas. Some of you got beat up worse’n others did, too. Your cocks and balls really were tied off with Magical icicles, and you’re all a bunch of eunuchs now. No more jerkin’ it, no more sex – for some of you luckier ones what got to really DO it – although I don’t know how ‘lucky’ I’d call NEVER bein’ able to do it again…and no more peein’ standin’ up. No more hormones, and pretty soon you’ll all settle right down and be good little boys for hundreds of years, trust me. Santa doesn’t need ugly old men to work for him. He needs elves. And elves are MADE, not born.”

“Ex-c-cuse me,” someone rasped.

“What?!” Tommy barked, “Who said that?”

Very slowly, James Milton raised his head and met his gaze. Tommy nodded at him, and his smashed nose mended at once.

“I’m not a bad guy, really,” Tommy offered. “What is it now?”

“Well, it’s just…just that,” he began, looking around at the staff of elves. “We’re bigger than you are?”

“I’m getting to that,” Tommy said with a very disturbing grin, as he cracked his knuckles. “You see, we have to eliminate the testosterone, hormones, aggressions, male combativeness issues, before we can proceed. If we don’t, the Magic won’t work right and you’ll die. You ever wonder how Santa gets to all those houses in ONE night?”

Everyone nodded, curious, despite the fact that they’d all just seen their genitals fall off! The word “die” got their attention as well.

“It’s a time-warp thing. Albert Einstein said something about time slowing down at near light speed, well, those reindeer go pretty damn fast, you know. Hence the fact that you all healed up and feel so different now. Only eight hours or so passed, really, but don’t you feel like something odd is going on?” Tommy continued, waving his hand as an oddly colored dust drifted from his fingertips to cloud them all. “Those of you in pajamas, don’t you think they’re a bit…big? Don’t you all feel a bit…younger?”

As he said it, many of the boys did in fact find their various articles of clothing suddenly a bit too large. A couple of them broke out in a sweat, and a few almost fainted. “Time is an odd thing,” Santa mused. “And hormone withdrawal is rough. It’ll not seem so bad in the morning, boys,” he assured them. “Tommy, why don’t you and some of the others take our new arrivals below, clean them up, and put them to bed? Let them sleep it off. We’ll deal with them tomorrow.” To the new arrivals, this suddenly sounded like a VERY good idea and they put up NO more resistance as they were unbound and led off, most of them already yawning.

“Yes, sir,” Tommy agreed, and they did just that.

 

When James Milton awoke the next morning, the first thing on his mind was presents! He’d had the oddest and most terrifying dream the night before, but as the light of morning spilled in through his windows, he jumped up out of bed feeling better than he ever had before! He also had to pee like he’d never had to before, as well! Rushing to the bathroom, he didn’t even realize that things had changed all around him until he peed right down his leg!

For a moment, he stood there in a strange bathroom, in absolute shock. He wasn’t in his room. He wasn’t in his bathroom. He wasn’t even in his own house! In fact, he had no idea where he was.

Then he raised a hand, and saw the red marks on his wrists as if he’d been bound. Very slowly, he reached down and touched himself, but his fingers found nothing there.

Once again, just as he had done before, James Milton screamed.

But no one heard him.

He spun around, but the boy that he saw in the mirror on the back of the door couldn’t possibly be him! This reflection was short, hardly ten years old, and he was far too soft and pretty looking to be…well, ME, the boy thought! He had no trace of a beard, and his dark hair was thick and in need of cutting. For a moment, he mistook this boy for his little cousin.

But in addition, he also noticed in stunned disbelief, the hairless little boy in the mirror had nothing between his legs. Gone was the seven inch cock and low-hanging balls that he loved to fondle, as well as all the body hair he’d been so proud of. And his muscles…he flexed his arms…so did the little boy…the muscles were gone as well. He touched himself again. So did the boy in the mirror. And it all came back to him: waking up, being kicked, THE SACK, and that…that…thing…the elf!

“Please don’t scream again,” a familiar voice then said.

James screamed anyway.

“You sound like a little girl when you do that,” Tommy teased him. Then he raised his already-arched eyebrows and ran a hand through his bright orange hair. “Of course,” he couldn’t resist adding, “You’re actually LESS than a girl now! Even girls have SOMETHING to fiddle with!”

“You…you…,” James spluttered, staring at the pointy-eared little boy in the white robe and slippers that had appeared out of nowhere in the bathroom with him. Not a boy, remember that, not a boy…a monster! Yeah, a monster! Be careful, James told himself.

“Yep, me,” Tommy agreed, reaching out as James flinched back. “C’mon now,” Tommy snorted, “I’m not gonna hurt you.”

James shook his head. “L-last night…,”

“Well,” Tommy conceded, “you put up a fight last night. Be a good boy now, and you’ll be OK. I promise. After all, if you’d been a GOOD boy, you’d not be HERE, would you?”

“N-no.”

“You’re learning,” Tommy nodded, taking the trembling boy by the hand. “Now, get a shower and get dressed,” he ordered, pointing to the maroon and green outfit hanging up near the door, “Then I’ll be waiting out here to make sure we get you all downsized just right and touched up for inspection. Don’t wanna make the boss mad, now, do we?”

“N-no,” James managed, as Tommy pushed him towards the bathtub. He grabbed up a long-handled scrub brush with that wicked grin on his face again and James cringed.

Once he was clean and dressed, Tommy seemed to approve. James, however, stared at himself in the mirror with a look of abject terror on his face. The bath had been disturbing, as his hands had encountered a much smaller and brand new body to explore. It was almost like touching someone else, it was so different. It was just WRONG.

“Stunning,” Tommy told him, taking his face in his hands. James noted, with even more fear, that he was looking the small elf right in the eye. Of course, he was much shorter than he’d been before Tommy had stuffed him into the SACK the previous night.

Then his ears began to tingle.

“What…what’r you doing?”

“Fixin’ your ears,” the elf replied, as James felt his own ears going hot and feeling as if they were melting and stretching. When Tommy removed his hands, James saw that the boy in the mirror – the elf in the mirror – indeed now had pointy ears. Tommy then brushed his fingertips over James’ pale face, and his cheeks began to glow with a rosy cast that sparkled.

“Stop...stop touchin’ me,” he breathed. “I don’ like it.”

“Tough shit,” Tommy said harshly. “Face it, tough guy! You’re not a boy anymore. You aren’t going to grow up into a big strong man, either. In fact, you’re DONE growing. You’re going to be 4’11” for the rest of your time here, maybe even the rest of your very LONG life! The ears stay, and so does the face. Your hair’s gonna get longer, too, and it’ll look so smashing in a nice long braid like mine,” the elf went on, turning around to show him. “Forget the muscles, forget the wankin’, and forget girls. Mrs. Claus is the only lady here, not that that means anything to YOU now, since you don’t have anything to WORK with, and she’s not put out since WW1 anyway!” Then he smiled that wicked and out of place smile again. “As for bein’ touched, get used to it!”

Something seemed to come to James just then, and he sat down on the edge of the big bathtub.

“You mean…it’s real? It’s all real? That’s Santa out there, and he’s…he’s…Mrs. Claus doesn’t like to…?” James stammered, his face going even paler.

Tommy laughed aloud, a tinkling and merry sound that made James’ blood run cold. “Oh, yes!” He laughed, “Santa likes a good piece’o’ass now and then, and besides the reindeer, that’s leaves…? C’mon, say it!”

“Elves,” James whispered, hanging his head in defeat.

“We have a winner,” Tommy cried, clapping James on the back and snapping his fingers. A mug appeared in his long-fingered hand. “Hot chocolate?” he offered, and James took it. “Don’ go too hard on that stuff, either. Not unless you want big hips and breasts. No balls, no hormones, remember? Fat piles up, you know.”

James drank down the cocoa and handed the mug back. “If you’re really good, you might get something stronger now and then,” he said. “But for now, let’s go present you to the boss. We’ve only got one more bit of Magic left to do on you, so that you stay young and healthy and oh so cute for … well, however long you’re here.”

“How long you been here?” James asked shyly.

“Me? Oh, a couple hundred years, lost track I guess. Been the right-hand elf for about 100 now, I think.” Then he puffed up his chest. “I’m Santa’s favorite, you know, that’s why “I” was the one who gets to do THE SACK thing.”

“How…how…do you, I mean, how do you…ever get used to it?” James asked weakly, still not wanting to believe it as Tommy led him from his room, grasping his shaking hand tightly. He realized, with no small amount of shame, that he certainly didn’t want anyone to see him like this!

“The clothes, bein’ short, er what?” Tommy asked. James didn’t catch the sarcasm.

“No, I mean…not bein’…a boy no more?”

Tommy laughed again, and James felt like crying. In one night, his life and his manhood had both been stolen by none other than Santa Claus and a homicidal elf! It was too much to believe!

“It’s not all bad,” Tommy informed him. “But, then again, that’s why YOU’RE here, since I’m retiring.”

“Y-you’re retiring?” James gasped. “How?”

Tommy smiled, a melancholy smile that was the sum total of all the things he’d missed in life since the night that he’d been stuffed into that same SACK. “I’ve been a good elf,” he sighed. “Now I get to retire.”

He didn’t seem to want to talk about it, though, and James was too terrified to press the issue any further as they arrived before a great set of double doors that read, “SANTA’S OFFICE”. Tommy knocked three times, and the doors swung open. He shoved a trembling James in.

“Tommy!” Santa cried happily, “Bit late in the day, isn’t it?” He asked, sipping at some cocoa as he sat behind the ornate old desk in a red velvet dressing gown.

“I figured you’d like to sleep in a bit, sir,” Tommy grinned at him.

“Any trouble out of him?” Santa asked, pointing at James, who nearly fainted.

“Not a bit, boss. He’s been a real good boy so far!”

“Excellent,” Santa replied, leering at James with a twinkling in his eye. He looked rather droll.

“I thought you might be up for the last bit of Magic, Santa, since James here just might be takin’ over for me?” Tommy asked.

Santa laughed, but it was not the jolly old “Ho, ho, ho!” of legend. It was a dark laugh, and it made James very afraid. “I am, in fact, Tommy! You know me so well!”

“I should by now,” the elf said under his breath, as Santa came around his desk to take James in hand.

“James, is it?” Santa asked politely, as he led the trembling boy towards another door. He nodded, but said nothing. “Well, James, I don’t know about replacing Tommy. There’s other elves that have been here longer and are up for a promotion, but there’s nothing that says that seniority has anything to do with being Santa’s favorite, now, is there?”

James was still speechless. As the door opened, however, he squeaked.

Right before him was the fanciest bedroom Suite that he’d ever seen before in his life, complete with the biggest bed that he’d ever seen as well! James swallowed hard, a hand straying to his crotch. He began to tremble even more violently, but Santa’s hand was on his shoulder. It seemed so large, and the jolly old fellow squeezed a bit. James fought down the urge to scream, Tommy’s guessing game answer still ringing in his ears…

ELVES…

“You’ll excuse us, then, Tommy?” Santa called back over his shoulder.

“I’ll just be getting packed,” Tommy replied, “See ya later.” And with that, he closed the doors and left. The sound echoed through the great room, and James found himself looking up at Santa Claus.

Some children cry when they are sat on Santa’s lap. James remembered that. He also remembered kids that threw fits, peed in their pants, threw tantrums, or even ran away. Running away seemed like a REALLY good idea to him just then…but Santa’s hand was on his shoulder! He was staring down at the new little elf, and his smile was anything but jolly and reassuring.

“Tommy mentioned the Magic,” the old man said, giving James a push towards the bed. He stumbled, caught himself, and then sat down on the edge of it. As he stared up at Santa in terror, the bearded man began to unbutton his robe.

No, James thought, No, this isn’t happening! This can’t be real! Santa isn’t…he isn’t real…he’s not right in front of me and…he’s not…he’s not getting NAKED right here!

But indeed, Santa Claus WAS real and he WAS getting naked. As the red velvet gown fell away, James was shocked to see that Santa wasn’t all that fat. In fact, he was very well built. His hair was white as his beard, but the body was not that of an old man who flew around eating cookies and drinking milk all night long. Santa was in shape, and he obviously knew it!

“The belly that shakes when I laugh like a bowl full of jelly is built into the suit,” Santa explained. “I did go through a fat phase, oh, around 1700 or so, and the image sort of stuck. Had to start working out, though, get in shape! You know how it is!” He explained happily.

“N-no,” James managed, staring at the man in disbelief. Santa, he saw, was becoming aroused. “Oh my God!” James squeaked.

“Impressed?” Santa asked, “This little thing?” He laughed, pointing down at his erection, which was pointed right at James’ face! “You might call it ‘the North Pole’, even!” Santa joked.

Confronted by a good 10” (10”, if it were even 1”!) cock surrounded in neatly trimmed white hair that even matched the beard, James fell over backwards in a dead faint!

“Newbies…Happens every time,” Santa sighed, giving the passed out elf a gentle pat to the cheek. “Wake up, now,” he ordered, patting a bit harder. Then he grunted and reached for a small bottle on the night stand. He uncorked it, waved it under James’ nose, and the odor brought the new elf back to life immediately! “No more fainting!” Santa laughed.

James shook his head. “No, please no! Please don’t…don’t hurt me!” He begged, his voice sounding not at all like he remembered it sounding. It sounded high and effeminate, and he couldn’t believe that he was begging! His former attitude and bravado had all but deserted him, and he realized that Tommy had been right. He wasn’t a man…he wasn’t a tough guy anymore.

Very gently, Santa sat down beside him and helped him out of his maroon tunic. He ran a hand over the elf’s smooth chest, tweaking his nipples as he did. Then he softly kissed his neck. One of his hands strayed to James’ crotch, and he pressed in a bit. “Forget the girl idea,” Santa reminded him, and James suddenly felt very aroused! It made NO sense whatsoever, but he immediately felt the burning need to get off! Then it hit him –

How was he SUPPOSED to get off, anyway?!

“Like that?” Santa asked, laying him back and giving his green tights a tug. They slid off easily, and James suddenly found his new body fully exposed in front of Santa.

“I…I…I never been…I mean, I don’t…not with…boys,” James spluttered, his face going very red.

Santa shrugged. “Some boys do, some boys don’t. Girls, boys, reindeer, …whatever. We’re very nonjudgmental here, Jamesey. You see, ol’ Santa gets horny – a lot – and the Missus doesn’t put out anymore. And I don’t like doing the reindeer,” he added with a grin.

“Y-you’re gonna…gonna…DO me, aren’t you?” James almost cried, looking away. Santa made him look back, gently turning his head to face him.

“That’s the last bit of Magic, yes,” he agreed, in a tone that was almost tender.

It was suddenly too much.

“NO!” James wailed, trying to pull away, “No! I can’t…I don’t believe it! Santa Claus isn’t some…some…child molesting freak! This can’t be happening! Santa doesn’t kidnap boys and turn them into elves to be…be sex toys!”

Santa snickered and shook his head, forcibly pulling James into a warm embrace. He held him as any concerned adult would hold a frightened child, comforting him, pressing his head down onto his shoulder so that the elf could cry and get it out of his system.

“James, listen to me,” Santa whispered in his ear. “You were a very bad boy. You always were. Tommy mentioned the Nintendo that you didn’t get at age eight, right?” James nodded, still not looking up. “The old rhyme says that I can see you when you’re sleeping, I know when you’re awake, la la la and all that rot,” Santa went on. “And it’s true. What they don’t tell you, though, is that Santa can even see into the future in some special cases of children who are extremely naughty and heading down the wrong path.”

“Huh?!”

“James, had Tommy not stuffed you into THE SACK last night and brought you here, things would have been very bad. You’d have started off by destroying your little sister’s Holiday Barbie set. She would have been traumatized, you would have laughed, but the effects of what you’d have done today, were you still there, would have been much more far reaching than that. Your little sister would have been so angry at you that she’d have come after you in the night, here in a few weeks, with your own baseball bat. She’d have beaten you half to death, James, and then after years of therapy, come after you again. Of course, no one would have missed you that bad, trust me, but after she killed you, it would have ruined her life. There would be four little children of hers that would never have been born, and she’d have spent the rest of her life in prison for your murder.”

“Y-you can’t know that,” James snapped, suddenly feeling very confused. “My sister would never…never…I mean, HOW can you know that? You’re jus’ sayin’ that!”

Santa shook his head sadly and reached over the night stand again. He handed James a small snow globe, and told him to shake it. There, in the globe, right before his eyes, the entire scene played out for the new elf to see. Sure enough, Janie was beating him to death with a baseball bat. Seconds later, she was being led away to prison.

“Janie is a good girl, and she has to stay that way,” Santa advised him. “Now, whether you believe me or not is irrelevant. You’re an elf, you’ve been altered, shall we say, and here you are. It’s time we get down to the last bit of Magical business, James. That is,” he added thoughtfully, “Unless you’d rather die.”

“Die?”

Santa nodded. “Well I can’t just dump you out in the shape you’re in now in some town and hope you survive, can I? That would blow our cover up here! Think of all the disappointed kiddies!”

“Think of the jail time for YOU,” James muttered.

“Exactly!” Santa exclaimed, which made James jump. “So, it’s either stay and be happy, or let the Magic run out shortly and force us to have to feed you to the polar bears!”

“Ughhh,” James sighed, bracing himself for the worst. He glanced at Santa’s hard and throbbing cock again and shut his eyes. “Magic, huh?”

Santa kissed him on the mouth just then, a hot, passionate kiss that sent a charge through his new elfin body. “The gift of Immortality is mine to bestow,” he explained. “We just need to so one little thing!”

“Little?!” James cried out, starting to shake again as Santa touched his smoothness and smiled.

“What? This old thing?” He asked jovially, wagging his cock at the elf, “Why, you’ll hardly notice it at all when I stick it in you!”

James found that one difficult to believe! After all, he’d never even had so much as a rectal thermometer up his butt before, and Santa was definitely larger than any thermometer he’d ever seen!

And then he was being turned on his tummy, feeling Santa’s hands on the smooth skin of his lower back. They massaged him, loosening and relaxing him, all the while moving down ever so slowly. He gasped as he felt his butt cheeks being parted, and then something warm and oily was being spread down there. He gasped again as he felt the tip of Santa’s finger gently pressing on his hole, tickling, and then finally sliding in. James yelped.

“Lubrication,” Santa informed him. “We don’t want to hurt you now!”

James smelled peppermint and pine, and inhaled the scents deeply. Santa’s finger was replaced by something round and rubbery just then, and James felt warmth spreading up inside of him. It was a very strange feeling, but not at all unpleasant.

“Mmm,” he sighed, unable to help squirming on the bed and feeling a desire that he’d never know rising up within him. He touched himself, but found nothing to grab hold of. He moaned. “No,” he cried softly.

“What’s wrong?” Santa asked, massaging him still more and loosening him further.

“I wanna!” James wailed, “But…but I can’t! There’s nothing there!”

“You can,” Santa assured him, “Just be patient. Elves have to be patient.”

And then James felt the tip of what he knew must be Santa’s cock touching him. He felt it press against him, and he tried to relax. It began to enter him, and he yelped.

“Push out and relax, that’s it,” Santa coached him, “Easy does it,” he groaned, his own excitement becoming evident in his voice. “There we go, just a bit further,” he said.

He was entering him. James could feel the enormous head sliding in, and then Santa began to press inward. He felt himself being filled. More and more of it was inside of him, and he began to wonder just how BIG it was! It felt as if there were end to it, as Santa urged his cock onwards and upwards. He cried out again as the pain hit him, but it didn’t last. It DID hurt as the jolly old man penetrated him, but the pain soon gave way to odd feelings that the new elf could not describe. He moaned.

“I think you like it!” Santa gasped, finally burying his white-trimmed shaft to the hilt in James’ behind.

“Oh man,” James gasped, never imagining that the thing that he and his friends had made fun of for so long could feel so good. He found that he did INDEED like it, and it confused him. Being gay was something that you were supposed to make fun of, laugh about, but never BE! Yet there he was, with Santa Claus inside of him and enjoying it!

And then he was carefully being turned over, so that he was lying astride Santa’s not so fat front side with his head just at the old man’s chest. He stared at his own lack of manhood, thinking of Santa’s that was now gently thrusting in and out of him in short strokes. He felt the need…he wanted to…he had to…but how?!

“I…I wanna cum!” the elf cried out, “Santa, what do I do?”

His only answer was laughter, but the feeling continued to grow. It felt as if something inside of him desperately wanted to get out. It was almost like the sensations of jerking off, but different. James felt as if he had to grasp his own penis, but it simply wasn’t there. He had no idea what to do with his hands as Santa moved inside of him, and he clenched his muscles hard around the old man’s cock. It went on and on, and the elf was nearly in tears with frustration and desire that he simply could not satisy.

It’s gone, James, he told himself bitterly, It’s all gone down there, and you’ll never get off again! THIS is what you get for being a bad boy! In longing agony, he clenched up again.

“That’s it, Jamesey, work with it!” Santa encouraged him, “Work with St. Nick now! Be good! Be good for Santa!” He yelled, and suddenly James felt something very hot explode up inside of him as Santa cried out. The thrusts became harder, almost painful, and James realized that Santa Claus was blowing a load into his bowels!

And then the tingling began to spread through his body. It began deep inside, and worked its way out slowly. James felt as if he were being split up the middle, and then he began to tremble and thrust his own hips. The top of his head felt light, and the spasms became more violent. He clenched up again, even harder, and as Santa cried out, “YES!” James felt his new body shudder in the ecstasy of his first prostatic orgasm.

For how long it lasted, the elf had no idea. He lost track of time. He was only aware of how good he felt, of what was up inside of him making him feel that way, and how he wanted it to last. He shivered and moaned, finally beginning to cry in relief, as the orgasm slowly rendered him limp and weak. He could feel ‘the North Pole’ growing softer inside of him, and he realized that he didn’t want it to end. He wanted to stay right where he was…

With one last little gasp, his head lolled over limply and he heard Santa whisper, “It’s just like Magic!”

 

“Everyone get to work!” Santa called out, surveying the scurrying industry going on below the observation deck of the Workshop. “We only have 360 days left!”

It was amazing what bad boys could accomplish, once they were relieved of the burdens of aggression from testosterone poisoning. Not to mention the fact that none of their time and energy could be wasted on such silly things as masturbation and fantasizing about sex!

“Right, Santa!” A chorus of piping voices called back, and the old man smiled. Then he turned to the elf at his side, who wasn’t dressed like an elf at all. This little elf was wearing a pair of khaki cargo pants and sneakers, a neat white pullover shirt, and a warm coat with a logo of some kind on it. He also wore a knitted band around his head over his rounded ears that wouldn’t mess up his short, gelled brown hair.

“And where will you go, now, Tommy?” Santa asked, “Now that you’re leaving me?” There was a touch of sadness in his voice, and he looked to be tearing up.

“Prudence said she could drop me off somewhere near Houston,” Tommy replied. “I was thinking about a warmer climate, you know, boss!”

“Ah, yes, the south,” Santa agreed, just as another elf came dashing up with a long roll of paper in his hand. “Boss, sorry, boss, but is this for REAL? I mean, all this stuff to build?”

Santa had to laugh. The new elves were always shocked at the inventory of toys to be made. “Yes, James, it’s for real,” he assured him.

“Whoa,” James muttered, then he saw Tommy. “Hi!” He greeted him, with no trace of the terror that he felt some nights before when he found himself being stuffed into THE SACK.

“Settling in, Jamesey?” Tommy asked politely, shaking his offered hand.

“Oh, yeah!” James replied happily, sneaking a wink at Santa and skipping off to get back to work.

“That didn’t take long,” Tommy observed sarcastically.

Santa looked thoughtful. “All if took was a little persuasion to bring out the best in James,” he said sagely.

“A little?” Tommy joked, and then Santa suddenly grabbed him up and kissed him.

“Ohhh, I’m going to miss you, Tommy,” he whispered in his ear, noting how round it was and no longer pointed. After all, Tommy was retiring and had put in for his severance package.

And in one single Magical moment, under the last full moon that Tommy would ever see at the North Pole, he’d been given his second chance at life. Santa had asked what he could do to reward such a good little elf who’d served him so well, and for so long. Such a good boy, he’d said, who’d learned his lessons, deserved something. And Tommy had asked for only one thing:

“I wanna be a real boy and try it all over again, sir. Maybe I’ll get it right this time.”

And Santa Claus had simply nodded. “So be it, then,” he’d said, and Tommy had gasped in surprise as his elf uniform had slowly dissolved into tiny puffs of whirling snow to leave him standing naked under the moonlight as the reindeer had looked on.

Prancer had sniffled. He always got emotional at such goings-on.

But the Magic had yet to run its course. As the maroon and green velvet suit dissolved away, and the mists spiraled up and around the shocked elf, he felt his face grow colder and his ears changing. He reached up slowly, his not-so-long-fingered hands finding the tips rounded off again.

And then he’d felt something odd between his legs.

Glancing down, Tommy saw that he was sporting all of a 2” erection above his tight little balls that had yet to ripen and fill out!

He was a real little boy again.

“Thank you!” he’d gasped in wonder, figuring that THAT wouldn’t have been part of the bargain.

“You’d better get in and get some clothes now,” Santa had said with a catch in his voice, “You’ll take a chill if you don’t, boy!”

And so it was that Tommy, former Favorite Elf and bearer of THE SACK for Santa Claus, climbed onto Prudence’s back and adjusted himself in the saddle. It felt different, now that he was no longer a eunuch! He smiled and patted her neck.

“Where do you want me to let you off at?” Prudence asked.

“I think Texas sounds good,” Tommy smiled at her. “I hear there’s some good people down there who might be of the mind to take in a lost, orphaned boy.”

Prudence nodded and smoothly rose into the sky with her small rider. The boy looked back only once, waving goodbye. And then the rose up into the clouds, and Tommy was gone. They all knew, even before he reached the Canadian border, that the former elf wouldn’t even remember the last couple hundred years.

Of course, it had to be that way.

“There he goes,” Santa sighed, “Off to start his new life. I miss him already.” He sniffled.

“C’mon, boss,” the elf at his side offered, tugging at his sleeve impatiently, “Let’s go take your mind off of it. Besides, it’s not like you can’t go see him in about a year, no matter where he ends up at!”

Santa Claus, who knew if you’d been bad or good, for goodness sake, looked down at the enthusiastic little elf and nodded. Then he smiled again.

“Right you are, Jamesey!” He admitted, “Now you keep a special watch on THE LIST! I want to make sure that one good little boy gets just what he wants for Christmas next year!”



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