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I showered for about 15 minutes, and still didn’t feel clean. The events of the day had left me pretty fucked up. I threw my piss sodden clothes in the washing machine, and then got changed into some clean clothes. I went downstairs, grabbed my smokes and wallet and left the house. Ian hadn’t arrived home from his office yet, so I locked up as I left. I’m not sure how long I was roaming the streets for, but soon I found myself in Liam’s locality. I decided to call up to his flat, maybe score some weed of him, so I could get stoned. I rang the doorbell, and Karen answered. Liam wasn’t in. My cock instantly got hard at the sight of her shapely body. Karen invited me in, saying that Liam shouldn’t be long. We made small talk, but above that there was not much to say. There was a sexual tension in the air, and it was making me horny as hell. I sat smoking a cigarette as Karen pottered around the house, tidying things – more for the sake of something to do, than from any need for cleaning. It was when she entered the bedroom that something inside me just flipped. I put out my smoke and followed her. What happened next is just a blur – I was operating on pure instinct. I came up behind Karen and grabbed her, forcing her unto the bed, next thing I knew I had my cock up her pussy and was fucking her. I could smell Liam’s scent was in the room, his deodorant hung heavily in the air, which made me even crazier. Karen who was pinned beneath me, pleaded for me not to continue. I kept fucking - other than her single set of requests and some sobbing; she did not put up much of a fight. She later said she knew I wasn’t going to stop and didn’t want to anger me more. She cried, and had tears streaming down her face, but my fucking continued at a frenzied pace – similar to the pounding that Jason had earlier given me. It was as if I could exorcise what he had done earlier, by doing the same to someone else. I felt myself cumming and soon I had sprayed my seed in her. I told her not to tell Liam or I would return and repeat the rape. She merely nodded as I pulled up my trousers and left the room.
It was approaching darkness when I arrived back at Ian’s place. He had returned, and was just about to serve up dinner. The moment I entered the room, he could see something was wrong. He pressed for information, but I gave him nothing and we ate in silence. Later, he called me to his room, where I found him naked, with cock erect. He beckoned me towards him, and began to feel my crotch. It was as he did, I began to cry. Ian listened as I told him what had happened at work, but deliberately leaving out what had happened earlier with Karen. Ian stroked my hair and put his arm around my shoulder, comforting me, but the words that came out of his mouth surprised me. “Well, for fuck sake lad, they were going to find out you were gay sooner or later, it might as well be now. It’ll all die down in a week: trust me.” I left his room feeling more confused then before. I expected some sympathy from him, but it was cold comfort I received. I slept little that night, but yet, before it seemed possible it was morning. I arrived at work to be greeted by guys wolf whistling and jeering as I walked through the site, back to my place of work. I didn’t go on break or lunch with the rest of my colleagues anymore – in fact it was made quite clear I wasn’t welcome to join them. They only had the minimum contact needed with me in order to get the work done. Every job I finished, lead to another isolated task. Occasionally, one or two of the guys would “stop by” – basically straight guys who wanted to be blown. I obliged, feeling I had not much of a choice. It was times like that I wished I had of stayed in school. The day finished soon finished, and about 5.15 I received a text message from Liam, saying he needed to speak to me. I went into a panic – Karen must have told him what had happened. Liam was going to fucking kill me – after all, I had raped his girlfriend. I replied, and said I’d call around to his flat at 6 p.m. I arrived at his place about ten minutes early, and paced outside, smoking a cigarette to calm my nerves. I didn’t know what I would say – if I got a chance, to explain what had happened. At 5.55 I knocked on the door. Liam answered and invited me in. We went upstairs, where he slumped onto the sofa. He looked deflated – and then he explained why. Earlier that day, Karen had left him, and went to stay with her mother. He didn’t know what had gone wrong, he explained. Inwardly I sighed with relief, I was safe for the moment. I sympathised with him, and we had a joint. Liam seemed very down – I guessed he loved her more than I had understood. A feeling of guilt washed over me, and even more regret over my actions weighed on my mind. We talked and chatted for a while, and then I went home. The next few weeks flew by. Work was the same. I received the attentions Jason, Frank and Gordon on different occasions. Now and again, one or two of “straight” guys who wanted to be sucked off, or occasionally fuck me also visited. Many guys would love to be getting regular attention, but my actions with Karen, and the consequences on my only real friend, still haunted me. I hung with Liam a lot more since that event, in order to keep him company. Eventually, one evening, while we were looking at a porno, he asked me to suck him. This was a surprise to me, as Liam had proven himself to be pretty much straight. I suppose now that he was girlfriend-less and to down to go out, I was the most convenient outlet for his sexual desires. It was a joyless experience for me, as he emptied himself inside me, the guilt of what I had done began to gnaw away at me with renewed vigour. Over the next few weeks things calmed down, and soon Liam began to come around a little bit. He was still down about Karen’s leaving him, but he became more social than he had previously been. Karen hadn’t come back, and as such the events of that night began to slip from my mind. Even work began to become more tolerable. As Ian had predicted, things had to die down. Most of the men left me to myself, except for the few regular “visitors”. It was only when Martin returned that things became unsettled again. I came home from work one day, to find him there. Ian hadn’t mentioned leave due, so his presence to startled me. The moment I entered the living room, he began to eye me up. He complimented my piercings, telling me I looked much more “fuckable”. He came over and grabbed my crotch, and fondled my balls roughly. “Come on boy. Get stripped and get to the fucking bedroom” he commanded. As was always the way when Martin commanded me, I obeyed.
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