One non-participating member is essential and we do not hold a competition if he is not there. Dr. Braun is our security blanket. If anything goes wrong, and it often does, he is there to repair as much of the damage as possible immediately. Even so, several times a year one of the members tries to do too much and becomes a eunuch.

   I'm one of the cautious ones. I increase the weight slightly about once a month. I'm also the only member who lets his balls hang. All the others wear briefs or a jockstrap. I wear boxer shorts. I like the feel of my balls bumping against my left knee as I walk. Of course, the cords and bag stretch permanently after a while and All of us have abnormally low-hanging balls. Bruno Hofmeister, our present champion genital weight-lifter has to stand on a couple of boxes so that the weights will clear the floor because his nuts hang four inches below his knees.

   There are several ways of lifting weights with your balls. I use a weight-hanger, a large metal disc attached to a giant U-bolt made of 3/8" steel rod. That is tied to my bag with a polyethylene rope and weights are piled on the disc. Right now, I use only 70 lbs. Bruno loops a steel chain with 1" by 3/8" links around his bag and bolts the end of it to the other side of the loop. Then he passes the chain through the hole in the center of barbell plates and secures them with another bolt. He does this squatting down and then straightens up, lifting the barbell plates off the floor. Bruno has lifted 150 lbs. this way. 

   We have a chain hoist attached to a girder in the old warehouse we rent for our meetings. Darryl Chambers lies on his back on a mattress with a rope tied around his cock and balls and to the hook of the chain hoist. Then the chain hoist is raised until Darryl's head and heels both clear the floor. Darryl weighs 130 lbs.

   Several others tie a bucket to their bags and have the members drop weights into it. Stu Wilkins prefers 5-lb ingots of plumbers' lead, lowered in one at a time. He tries to add another each week Hank Johnson, the only black in the club, likes people to file by and add iron washers one at a time to the pile in his bucket. When he can't stand the pull any more, he says so and then the bucket is lifted and weighed. The weight he can stand varies back and forth between 80 and 90 lbs.

   Dave Billings ties a stirrup to his bag with clothesline and invites people to put their hands on his shoulders, step up on the stirrup and them take their hands off his shoulders for as long as they can without falling over.

   If anybody gets a hernia, Dr. Braun sends him to the ER and won't let him compete any more. Even those who don't get ruptured or get their balls ripped out suffer damage. All of us have varicocele (varicose veins of the epididymis) and all of us show declining sperm counts. Dr. Braun runs sperm counts on all of us at the end of every meeting and the trend is always downward. Mine was 100 million when I joined and now it's 15 million, so I'm sterile. The varicocele and the pinching of the spermatic vein and artery as the cord is stretched probably accounts for it. 

   One man hangs weights from his dick. Geoffrey Crowninshield has a dick which curves sharply upward like a fishook. He started hanging weights from it when he was 12 years old, trying to straighten it out. He can bend it down until the end is level with the base, but in between it's still just as strongly curved as ever. Dr. Braun says he'll fracture it one of these days and may well make himself impotent.

   There's a meeting tonight. It'll be interesting to see what happens. I'm not going to increase the weight I use just yet.

   Man ! This was Disaster Night. We sure kept Dr. Braun busy. Bruno tried for 175 lbs. and ruptured himself. He never lifts those barbell plates more than 6 inches above the floor, but they fell with a loud CLANK and two fist-sized bulges popped out in his groins . Telling us to take a recess, Dr. Braun drove Bruno to the ER for hernia surgery. When he came back, about 40 minutes later, we resumed out weight-lifting. Geoffrey had just hung 70 lbs from just behind the corona of the glans of his dick when we all heard a distinct "CRACK" and it straightened out ! Immediately, it went limp and a swelling shaped like a donut appeared around the base of it. Dr. Braun bandaged it and sent Geoffrey home to rest. 

   Well, things went along quietly for about a half hour and then Stu Wilkins' buddy Ed dropped an ingot of lead that he had been holding over the bucket waiting for Stu to decide if he dared take any more. Stu was well above his previous limit, up to 95 lbs. He had just been about to say "That's enough." as he told us afterward, when Ed lost his grip on the ingot and dropped it into the bucket. The extra weight plus the impact was too much. We heard two "SNAP"s, one slightly ahead of the other, and a ripping sound as the bag tore, dropping the bucket onto the floor followed by Stu's bag, balls, and about half of his cords. Dr. Braun tied off Stu's broken cords and sewed up the remains of his bag, gave him an antibiotic and a pain killer and then drove him home telling us to adjourn the meeting. We had never had more than one injury in a single meeting before. 

   Everybody I spoke to said that this shouldn't stop us from continuing to hold genital weight-lifting sessions and we agreed to meet again next week.